Review of "99p Stores"
''The Differend: Phrases in Dispute' -- Jean - Francois Lyotard; definitely a winter warmer.
Retailer - 99p stores
99p red balloons go buy
We are inundated with media storms of credit crunching, greed and total mayhem amongst our authoritarians. Nothing is shock worthy anymore. News items of waste and bamboozle mismanagement sweeps the UK. I was laughing out loud at the docile mincing bobbies (Police) who filled up their patrol cars with the wrong fuel, costing the taxpayer over £1 Million a year, many are doing this every week. No wonder we see so many on push-bikes in town centres.The 99p Store, in comparison is a true breathe of fresh air (air fresheners 99p) to consumers who are riddled with debt up to their ears (Earplugs 99p) and still paying for ex – Bankers pensions. The whole concept is proof of how much the consumer actually gets stung for and how much is priced on branding and marketing costs which are paid by us, the consumer again. The same products are displayed in an orderly state, looking slightly different than our recognized big brands for a fraction of the cost. It makes perfect sense, it is no wonder that during times like these which have been brought on by the ‘wide white boy, pinstriped greed’ that the rest of us can at least window shop and actually buy something, without being stung by the retail beast. The only thing is, I hope the fat-cats (Cat-food 99p) will continue to bypass this store and think it’s all old tat. Yes, you really get ordinary people in these stores. They’ve stopped watching Jeremy Kyle (Jeremy Kyle calendar 99p) and waddled down to the store. The 99p Stores is doing more for UK’s obesity problem than Jamie ‘lazy tongue’ Oliver ever did. That’s before getting customers in and then scoffing the confectionary deals, ‘waddling pain and then the gain’ (Rosemary Conley diets 99p)
The fresh air could change drastically in the summer months as I can distinctly smell a few of the shoppers (antiperspirants 99p) as they play with the mechanics of the hand-held, push-a-long trolleys which are designed for 4 year old dollies. ‘How much is this then?’ is the infamous line when in this shop. – I wait for the laughter to stop (Joke book 99p). The staff has been mauled with this wise crack and is greeted with a wince followed with a disconcerted cough (Lockets 99p) which sounds like a rude word. ‘Keep the change!’ this line is always used as the shopper continues the pun to pour agony onto the staff member who seems to have got a nasty cough which unfortunately does sound like a very rude word. ‘You better get that seen to; it could be swine flu or something a lot worse like a case of gingeritis’. The remark floats well above them (Aero Pack 99p), and the cough goes miraculously.I do like the store. The fact that all items are the same price has saved this type of store a huge amount of stationary alone. There are no price tickets or stickers so that has save a bomb on expenses. It is also very green as sticky price tickets are not very green, and certainly non recyclable, due to the stickiness (Large Prik-Stik 99p) on one side. It also saves on man-power as staff usually just stocking shelves or on the cash tills; or like it is in my area, talking to each other blocking shoppers from viewing the items, probably wanting to know the price. The best buy I have picked up in the store has been twin blades for my ailing manual shaver. I had been looking for these shamefully all over the place, as they’ll permanently not available anywhere. It is also a fantastic meeting place for friends and family. Hubbies are usually hiding behind a Green washing-up bowls praying for the queues to disperse. There is still nervousness around UK’s public that does not want to be known to be a scathing bargain hunter, which we all are.
The deals of getting 4 Mars bars for the price of 99p or any confectionary chocolate bar delight is impressive and it is on their website in deals of the week so Nadir the 99p store owner is feeling happy about it as well. Good quality brands are also making an appearance, not sure if they’re out of date (Dates 99p) merchandise, but the proof is in the tasting and who is going to complain, it was only 99p. It would cost more in fuel to make a special trip into our Witney town centre. – No, I’m not a Cameron fan (Cowboy hats 99p)! – The store is still new but it is already taking a firm footing for Witney consumerism. It replaced the eye-sore of a stripped Woolworths which was missed in Witney town centre. Now the centre looks a bit livelier and that is good for moral and the local economy. It is just a battlement with trolley, pushchair, and pram now. The 99p store beat the competition of a Wetherspoons, (pub guide book 99p) I wasn’t happy about it before but since getting my shaving blades and cheap chocolate supply, I am luke warm about the decision with the mood changeable depending on whether there is any sun later (sun tan lotion 99p).99P Stores Ltd is a family orientated business established in January 2001 (Calender Girls DVD 99p). After having opened three 99p Stores in 2001, Nadir Lalani expanded (Family packs of crisps and Pringles 99p) the business throughout the UK and has rapidly developed 99p Stores Ltd which in turn has indulged over 600,000 customers weekly. The number of 99p Stores to date is 72. – What I like about the 99p Store vision is that it derived by Nadir going to Poundland and thinking that the items were expensive, and vowed to under-cut (Garden Cutters 99p) profit margins by 1p. Since the 99p Stores opened many Pounland retailers have subsequently closed due to huge drop in profits; in some cases up to 70% of turn-over had gone to 99p Stores Ltd. Poundland missed a trick (Magic Set 99p)
Incredibly 99p Stores made a pre-tax loss of £1.14 million in the year 2007, there business model was in-place and secure. Since , the economic down-turn the fortunes changed for them and as consumers looked more wisely for bargains because of the current financial crisis. 99p Stores now boast they get Lawyers, Merchant Bankers and Surgeons frequently doing a binge on sugar products (The Apprentice 2007 book 99p).Well, everyone is in the firing line these days.
The downside is the change you get, let me re-phrase, the change I get. I get it in 1 pence coins, I wondered if it is a company policy, but alas it is not. It’s just the way the cookie crumbles; (Cookie Mixture 99p)
What about a ‘1p Store Ltd?’ Nadir Lalani; over to you.
Thank you for reading ‘99p red balloons go buy’.Copyright - 06 – 2009 - 1st2thebar
Product Information : 99p Stores
Manufacturer's product description
Listed on Ciao since: 15/02/2004