I have very dark brown hair and very fair skin. And it doesn't look pale and interesting but pasty and flabby. On the other hand, I'm only really recently into the whole heat thing- I'm more of a shade person, and though I use to tan really easily as a kid, now I have a tendency to burn in unfortunate streaks where the factor 20/25 (told you I was pale) didn't quite make it. This leads to interesting smudgy brown patches down your arms, one side of your nose and one cheek. Trust me, I know. But I didn't want to do my whole body, just match my legs to my already a little brown arms so that I can wear a skirt!

Since it's always a good idea to exfoliate and moisturise dry patches. I used the Soltan exfoliator because I'd run out of my last one- I tend to change exfoliators randomly. To describe the Boots one briefly, it's a moussey white cream with those little gritty things that do all the work and it leaves legs smooth and soft so it does the trick. It comes in a white tube to match the bronze tan tube.

So, you've shaved, scraped and smoothed and now the application process begins. The first time I applied it I used only a little and that really is the right way to go. You squeeze out a pinky bronze cream with gold glitter (be careful, too strong a squeeze and you'll empty the packet all over the floor- it's generous). It smells a little sickly, but although this scent will hang around, it fades to a quite pleasant sweet smell. Since it's tinted, and don't worry, you won't be this colour, it's easy to spread carefully, making sure an even amount of colour gets everywhere. I cannot emphasize this enough: TAKE YOUR TIME. Watch out for ankles and knees. The instructions on the tube are simple and to the point, of the prepare, apply carefully, wash hands and let dry variety. You must wash your hands afterwards and here is the important thing. Let no water near your body for 2 hours. Although it only takes about ten minutes to dry (during which time I've found it's safe to perch on the edge of the loo!) it takes two hours to set and become fully waterproof and sweatproof. This is really the tan for the patient. The second time I applied this I did it in a hurry, so overloaded my ankles (the good news is it fades over about four days and it was bad weather!) and didn't notice a dribble of water on my leg which left a lovely streak mark. Fabulous, darling.

Now a word about the glitter. Unless you're going to a Goldfinger theme party, it may seem a bit much. And you'll notice that if you touch your legs during the two hour development period glitter will come off on your hands (rinse it off, just in case!). I did this on a slow morning watching kids TV (you know they still have Boy Meets World?) so I rinsed my legs off after two hours. People with lives cannot do this, so either have an evening in with the fake tan, or get really good at applying it and go with a fast drying one. Or go have it done professionally. Once you rinse your legs off you'll be left with a healthy golden glow, very subtle with just a hint of shimmer, which is lovely. A second application may be needed, either after 2-3 hours as the tube suggests, or in the next two days as I've found, to deepen the colour.