Brain Teasers

(1)
A married man was visiting his "girlfriend" when she requested that he shave his beard.
"Oh James, I like your beard, but I would really love to see your handsome face."
James replied, "My wife loves this beard, I couldn't possibly do it, she would kill me!!"
"Oh please?" the girlfriend asked again, in a sexy little voice...
"Oh really, I can't," he replies..."My wife loves this beard!!"
The girlfriend asked once more, and he sighs and finally gives in. That night James crawls into bed with his wife while she was sleeping.
The wife is awakened somewhat, feels his face and replies "Oh Michael, you shouldn't be here, my husband will be home soon!"

(2)
There was a lady from the countryside who came to the city and checked into a hotel. Then she said to the bellman, "I refuse to take a tiny room like this, with no window and no bed in it! You can't treat me like a fool just because I don't travel much! I'm going to complain to the manager!" So the bellman said very politely, "Madam,
this isn't your room. It's the elevator!"