Clarins UV Plus Protective Day Screen SPF 40

Never mind Derren Brown, the people in everyday society who have real mind control powers are the women who work on the beauty counters.

In day to day life I'm pretty good at sussing out when I'm being scammed. I've never once even vaguely entertained the notion that I might be related to a Nigerian nobleman who died mysteriously in a plane crash in which there were no other casualties and which was, oddly, entirely undocumented by any news networks. I don't believe that any JML products will improve my life and I can usually ascertain whether 'BOGOF' deals are actually advantageous or just a cunning way to get me to spend more money on two of the same thing that I didn't need in the first place.

However, once those orangey-faced ladies have me in their tractor beams I become a credulous, simpering eejit. And so it was a couple of weeks ago when I went to buy a birthday present for a friend. The lady on the Clarins counter told me that the twenty quid gift set I was eyeing up came with a free goody bag if I bought just one more product. She waited a beat before adding '...and, with that beautiful porcelain skin of yours, almost any of our products would suit you perfectly. Apart from the anti-ageing products, naturally. You won't need those for at least another twenty years'. At this last utterance I practically leaned over the counter and licked her before bidding my debit card a fond farewell and a reminder to come back once he was spent. Now, I know that this is the same old flannel that they tell everyone but it'd been a long, tough week and I was quite prepared to be flattered. This might go some way to explaining why I merrily handed over twenty nine of my hard earned pounds in exchange for a TINY bottle of what is, essentially, sun cream.

So now, onto the good points of the amazingly expensive cream.

Sun protection

SPF 40 sounds like a lot, but in these regards, more is more. The skin on your face sees more sun than anywhere else on your body (unless you're an exhibitionist naturist) and is most likely to become burnt and wrinkly. And, well, no-one wants to look like Donatella Versace, do they? So the only thing to do is slap sun protection on. Most foundations and facial moisturisers contain an SPF of around 15-18 but this really isn't high enough if you're going to be in the sun for a large portion of the day and if, like me, you're paler than Nosferatu.

The sun protection in this cream is really effective and I know this as I had it on whilst outside all day at a Sports' Day and my face stayed a normal colour, rather than the fire-engine red it would have been had I not put it on.

As a make up base

Clarins recommend that you apply this after your moisturiser and that it will have the effect of making skin matte and even. I confess that I don't always bother with moisturiser in the morning and it seems to be fine without it. When first applied it looks startlingly white but as long as you don't slap loads on it soon becomes invisible. It goes on my skin really smoothly and easily and feels like a very slightly chalky serum (this texture is, I assume, because of the mineral content). Once on, there's a very light floral scent which fades quickly. Make up blends really easily and gives me a much fresher look than if I hadn't used anything as a base. It feels totally weightless and non-sticky which I love, as I can't bear the feeling of products 'on' my skin.

There is a certain amount of truth in the mattifying claim: it won't render you non-shiny if you have a really oily T-zone, but it definitely makes my nose and forehead even and matte (I have pretty normal skin). It won't cover blemishes, though, and doesn't make any claims about plumping the skin or filling out wrinkles so if this is something you require a make-up primer might be more what you're looking for.

Anything else?

The bottle is very dinky (a mere 30ml) and could easily be slipped into a handbag if needs be. Mind you, it seems to have good staying power and I've never felt the need to reapply. The spout is very small and is one of those where you have to squeeze the bottle quite hard to dispense any product. This is a plus for me, as a little of this cream goes a long way - an amount the size of a five pence piece covers my whole face - and the spout ensures you won't accidentally waste any. I could imagine it being tricky to get the last dregs out but I'm not averse to hacking the bottle open with a Stanley knife in order to get my money's worth.

The sun protection comes from 100% mineral content so there are no nasties to clog your pores and make you all spotty. It claims to protect against free radicals, which is almost as good as if it protected against the New Radicals and other one hit wonders. It also contains white tea and I'll confess that I have no idea what that does for you. I assume it's better than brewing up a big mug of PG Tips and painting that on your mush.

Would I buy again?

Hmm. As much as it's a great product, I'd probably only buy this again if it was on offer as at almost £1 per ml it is an expense that I can't really justify. Mind you, I'm quite prepared to accept it as a gift and my birthday's in January, lovely Ciaoers. Just saying.