Do you consult online reviews before making a purchase?

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Do you consult online reviews before making a purchase?

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Review of "Do you consult online reviews before making a purchase?"

published 14/11/2017 | arthurteacake2
Member since : 10/09/2017
Reviews : 18
Members who trust : 1
About me :
Your comment on the Domestos bleach review is very unnecessary with regards to saying about drinking it.
Good
Pro I've got fifty Bentleys, in the West Indies;
Cons It doesn't matter.
very helpful

"Do I consult online reviews before making a purchase?"

In sadness, truth speaks

I'm annoyed right now. Bertrand and I have had a falling out, and I own a lot of pathos today.

I see what’s going on here. This topic is a thinly-disguised, sick attempt by Ciao to perform a health check of this website by trying to understand who in their right minds would use it. Let me expedite proceedings. Ciao is as much use to a typical purchasing decision as a catcher’s mitt is to performing open heart surgery.
Making time

Ciao isn’t a bad place to be, it really isn’t. It’s like a town square; sure, there are a few tramps, undesirables, teenage glue-huffers and pigeon crap staining the cobbles, but it’s a place of social interaction, the coming together of hearts and minds, and the exchange of peaceful debate, at least until one party becomes petty or defensive. If you ask me, the website’s whole review-cum-compensation model could be completely removed and the values of Ciao would live on, without a sinister undercurrent of petty vendettas, odd essays on bleach or nail polish and members making up crap about not being able to rate less-frequent collaborators due to self-imposed ‘time-constraints’. And on that last one – let’s be honest, if you’re finding moments in your day to effectively contribute to Ciao, you’re not exactly short of time – myself included.

Squeaks on the way in

If we move away from our cocoon of bizarrely-compensated unvirtuous drivel, I feel that the measure of a review site’s success is measured by its business model being geared to driving volume of reviews, ostensibly by making it simple for users to submit them. Look at Amazon, or TripAdvisor; dead easy to post a review; and hey presto!, you have tons of write-ups about one resort, one DVD, or whatever. Prospective buyers will swiftly browse the reviews and can draw up their own decisions based on their own interpretations of a wide field of opinion. For example; Bertrand and I are really into over-sized dildos, and we were looking at one called ‘Black the Ripper’.

Before sending Pepe to the local engine store to pick up a couple of the contraptions, we browsed online for advice. The first review that came up on Amazon was a five-hundred word, detailed explanation of dimensions, packaging, weight and how it was used, as well as the all-important feeling. It was a little Ciao-like (the review; not the dildo – but I am used to getting ‘stiffed’ on here, shall we say). Now if I would have stopped my reading there, I would have been impressed with the jolly old ‘Ripper. But I scanned. I browsed. I had seen the sex toy in a shop and knew its dimensions and everything else practical. I didn’t need to read about it, in the same way I don’t need to read how big a box of cereal is. But reading a few more opinions about the ‘Ripper, I became aware that it wasn’t the invasion-piece for us. Simple, one-paragraph thoughts sculpted our mindset; snapshots of opinion like “fits snug”, “bit of a stretch”, “squeaks on the way in” and “tore me to shreds”. After reading maybe ten reviews, the over-riding feeling was that most users were pitching up in the “torn-to-shreds” camp. The final straw was an uploaded picture (since removed) of one man’s hindquarters which, after using the Ripper, looked like the service entrance to the Danish Crown Slaughterhouse.

The bad dream

It’s different in these parts. Posting a review on Ciao is a f**king nightmare; you know, one where it takes ages to fall asleep and then you have a really ungainly dream about being ripped apart by evil-eyed grandmothers with big teeth and wooden, claw-like hands; where you then die, but quickly enter that ‘falling’ stage of slumber where you’re shoved awake and lie in your bed covered in cold sweat, the mattress damp with urine. That kind of nightmare. If you manage to get the website working, get writing, fathom out the arcane formatting code and click ‘submit’, you’re then rated; but not always on content. Often, people are rated based on how popular they are, and on whether their writing is worthy of The New Yorker. Not in terms of quality (Ciaoers don’t care much for that) but in length.
Waking up

The process is so laborious, counter-intuitive and thankless that new members are scared away, leaving a hardened core of Ciao elite pumping away largely unreadable write-ups of products that they alone use; many listings only have one or two reviews that would potentially be read. For example, one leading brand of shampoo, popular today in 2017, only has one review dated from 2006. So let me close by telling you this; yes, usually I will consult online reviews, but never, ever on this site. And no matter how long and detailed you make your review, the average reader will want – and need – something that Ciao can never offer – consensus over conjecture.


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Comments on this review

  • Soho_Black published 20/11/2017
    It is something of a surprise that Ciao remains at all, given that there are many, far more fit for purpose review sites available.
  • justarube published 16/11/2017
    Interesting thoughts
  • Westy4 published 15/11/2017
    Very interesting piece.
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Product Information : Do you consult online reviews before making a purchase?

Manufacturer's product description

Ciao

Listed on Ciao since: 09/11/2017