Everything that starts with G ...

G is for Grumpy old men.

I work with one, and to preserve their dignity and my job I am going to omit his name from this critique. But I can help wondering why someone that had already retired legitimately at the age of 65 would then decided to return to work if it was obviously making them miserable?

Now the first thought would be that he needs the money – not the case. He is our accountant and very good with pension schemes and bank accounts. Always willing to tell someone what they should be doing with their mortgage or savings (please note this is whether they want the ‘advice’ or not) and has a very nice lifestyle by all accounts.

Though if you are brave enough to risk the loud sighs and banging of drawers to ask for something – like petty cash for a pint of milk, you may be forgiven for thinking this is actually coming out of his own pocket.

He stops just short of being rude to people over the phone and complains about working part time as he thinks he should be on flexi-time letting him come and go as he pleases.

Christmas decorations have been banned as a health hazard and the xmas cards we do happen to get go straight into the recycling bin. I am considering spraying “Bah, Humbug!” on the window of his office in fake snow as a warning to others.

As far as I can tell he dislikes: Children, the unemployed, students, women, traffic wardens, the postal system, the metric system, the office carpet and the colour green. And that is only the PC list that doesn’t include the very offensive references to ethnic minorities and other cultures.

As far as I can tell there is nothing he does like and everyone is too wary of this man to complain or take any positive action about it.

I wonder sometimes if he did not want to retire form his previous job but they took the opportunity to get rid of him legitimately with his retirement.

His CV is impressive and a smallish firm like mine would be lucky to find someone as qualified with the amount we can pay but with comments like “my secretary always used to do that this way…….” And “Tell them they can wait to get paid, they are not that important”. It’s no wonder we have fantasised about superglueing his office door shut with him inside!

So my Christmas wish this year is not for peace and goodwill to all men but that this one man in particular is filled with the Christmas spirit of peace and goodwill. Remembers what it is like to smile, be nice to his fellow man.

What’s more I don’t care if he has to be visited by a whole host of ghosts for this to happen!