Ikea [TV Advertisement] > Reviews (8)

...the continuing tale of redecoration and refurbishing for the bedroom of the dave27-ettes...

You may have read the first instalment in this series under the Crown Paint category (AND IF NOT, WHY THE HELL NOT!!!), and this next one continues the story.

For those of you unlucky enough to miss out (poor misguided chaps and chapesses, that you are), I'll recap very swiftly...

It's July 2001 ... the dave27 clan has decided to forego a holiday this year in order to redecorate and refurbish the dave27-ettes bedrooms and we've started the process by stocking up with Crown paint and now we're ready for the next stage. Now read on .....

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Björkvalla, Herresta, Bialitt, Ekeberg, Tromso, Kaffatorp, Morkedal, Ektorp, Klinte, Stromstad, Niklas... no, it ain't the Chelsea first team, it's just a few of the products you can avail yourself of at the very, very Swedish home furnishings warehouse retailer, IKEA, they of the blue and yellow sign and the exorbitantly priced hot dogs (sorry, that should be Hoetten Dogges).

The man behind the craze which has spoiled the Bank Holidays of countless numbers of British slobs is Ingvar Kamprad and the name came from his initials plus the farm and village where he grew up, Elmtaryd and Agunnaryd. Kamprad was born in south Sweden in 1926 and from his early years he seemed destined to be a businessman. When he was a kid he biked his way round his neighbours and made money from selling matches. He soon cottoned on to the idea of buying them in bulk and splitting them up for small sales at massive profits.

In 1943 he decided to set up IKEA and shortly afterwards he was invited to Paris to meet one of his suppliers and he gained some new ideas. He also started selling his products via catalogue and mail order and in 1950 he moved into the furniture game, quickly specialising in the sale of low price furniture, which was made by local manufacturers. He opened a local furniture showroom in 1953 and the company started designing its own products in 1955. Then he started facing competitors applying pressure to force his suppliers to boycott him.

During this time, one of his employees who was delivering goods to a customer decided to take the legs off a table in order to make it easier to fit in his car. This gave Kamprad the idea of producing furniture which was flat packed for delivery and the IKEA unique selling proposition was born.

By 1963, the IKEA stores had started to spread across Scandinavia, with a branch opened just outside Oslo in Norway and the empire spread from there, finally spreading outside Scandinavia in the early 1970s, although it was 1987 before the first British store opened. Thereafter, the Evil Empire spread the length and breadth of the country and when it reached Warrington three or four years ago, it was close enough to give Good Old dave27 some real fears for his future sanity and this is where we came in with Mrs D insisting on a July trip to collect the furniture for Lewis' bedroom.

I took a day's leave so I could transport them for the day and things were just about bearable because there weren't too many people visiting.

On many occasions when we've been before, usually at a weekend or on a Bank Holiday, the place has been absolutely packed out and we've had to park what seems like a mile away. That's one of the worse things about IKEA - it tends to get extremely busy and almost unbearable. Be prepared for a load of hassle when you do go. Also, you need to be prepared for a lot of exercise all round, because the only way to get round IKEA is to walk, and it's a bloody long way with virtually no short cuts. The other bad thing about IKEA is the embarrassment of walking round with one of those bloody awful yellow shoulder bags which you are intended to use for your shopping. They make you look like the perfect English teacher (i.e. leather elbow patches, shorts and sandals) and I'd dare you to go into the pub with one of these about your person.

Our shopping list included a bunk bed with space underneath for work and play (well, just play knowing Lewis), a wardrobe, a desk and a lamp.

We decided in the end on a Tromso bed, which was made of silver lacquered metal. It cost £99, but when you got up close you found that you had to get a mattress as well and the cheapest one IKEA does is £80. The mattresses are bigger than they are normally in the UK as well (by about two or three inches each way), so you can't even really use your own. We were quite pleased by the price, however, and it looked sturdy enough. Word of warning - the Tromso comes packed in three immense parcels which won't fit even in a Scenic Megane with the seats down, so we were forced to strap them to the roof rack.

We had a look at their range of wardrobes and had settled on one, but when I went round the back I saw that the back was actually just a big piece of hardboard panel pinned to the frame and we were not very impressed. We were resigned to looking elsewhere, which would have meant a very pleasurable trip to MFI, but in the end we came across the Rigga clothes rack, which cost just a tenner and again looked quite sturdy.

For the desk we chose the Nero which was a crescent shaped table costing 35 quid and you could also get these feet for the legs that resembled either little shoes or a pair of dinosaur feet, very striking, although I thought they were a complete waste of dosh.

Lastly, the lamp, a kind of coach lantern, called a Brons, which cost about a tenner, and fitted in with the blue and silver style which we'd settled on for the room.

We were quite pleased in the end with our choice, both in terms of their sturdiness and their price, and there were plenty of other varieties to choose from, but I have to say that IKEA are best for trinkets and accessory type things rather than major pieces of furniture. You feel that they're a bit shaky and rattly at times, although that could be because of the lack of DIY ability present in the dave27 household. I'd also suggest that you don't browse as you can buy a lot more than you intend when going in because they stock some quite attractive nick nacks which are relatively inexpensive and appeal to impulse buyers (they've got Mrs D down to a T and I have to struggle to assert sanity and reason and discipline on an IKEA trip).