A FULL SIZED OLYMPIC TRAMPOLINE PLEASE
 Aug 3rd, 2007
Advantages:
Racks full of bargain unsporty goods
Disadvantages:
Racks full of bargain unsporty goods
Recommendable:
No
Detailed rating:
Price
Value for money
Selection & range
Availability
Quality
Staff knowledge
more
  jerry6525
About me:
Member since:12.04.2007
Reviews:13
Members who trust:2
Review rated by 8 Ciao members on average: helpful 
This review received a counterstatement by a party concerned
Read Comment
A sincere thank-you to those out there who have asked me to write more. I have been living a twilight world recently, but now I see daylight. The twilight world begins at that moment approaching sleep when you are neither asleep nor awake. You feel that you can move normally but either you can’t, or you move in a spasmodic jerk. You think you can talk, but all that comes out is meaningless uncontrolled grunting. And then, when you have woken yourself up with your jerks or your grunts, you lose the will to sleep altogether. And then, that really is the twilight world. As the clocks tick by into the dark hours of the early morning, the twilight world is at your feet. All manner of pastimes are at your mercy – pointless ones, creative ones, pastimes kept secret from your sleeping companion. Ebay is a good one – “Buy it Now - £14-99 (from Taiwan)” - 13 minutes to go on that thingy – fashioned from the purest Chinese synthetic gold. Or even better fun – sign in to the American or Australian one, where, as you while away the night, they are bidding frenziedly. “Ask the seller a question” – “Would you tell me the cost of shipping your
Grand Piano to Macclesfield please”. Is this familiar? Or do you opt for relining your kitchen drawers at 3.30am? Ironing? Watching that incomprehensible all night gameshow on ITV? (Will someone PLEASE tell me what is supposed to happen there.) Or maybe sleep comes easily and deeply, and the twilight world is not a familiar place.Oh, but it is. Oh yes.To get an idea of this grey soulless world where nothing works, I commend you, dear reader, to walk into this High Street Sports Shop. Well, maybe I shouldn’t be too critical: Pawnshops don’t sell pawns, after all; drugstores don’t sell many drugs. So why should JJB Sports sell too much vaguely relating to sport?“Ah” you say, “they do”. No they don’t.Go on – I dare you. Go into your local emporium tomorrow and ask for any of the following: a cycling helmet, a set of bowls, a pair of ice skates, a horse saddle, a water polo ball or a full sized Olympic trampoline. And I guarantee……no – you know what the answer is don’t you? They are all sports – some of them with VERY high participation. And YOU KNOW what the answer will be.So if sports equipment consists of an almost limitless supply of football shirts, a few tennis balls, running shoes (proudly displayed on a wall and supervised by one who has never worn such an item in anger), a huge job lot of discounted “designer” stuff and a wide range of swimming unwear (the discounted swimmies look tempting but they were all from Casa Pavarotti), I am afraid that’s your lot.
"Er good afternoon, I hope you can help me. I am looking for a medium sized left handed lacrosse stick".
"Yer whaa?"
"A lacrosse stick"
"Cross stitch? - Yer wanna go a sewing shop"
"No no - L A C R O S S E - it's a Canadian game"
"Yer whaa?"
"I need a Lacrosse stick. My daughter has broken her stick"
"I'll ge' my supervisah - OIH, vis bloke's daw'er's broken 'er cross stitch"
One could be forgiven for not stocking lacrosse sticks, but here is a thought – Angling (I do not participate) is the biggest participatory sport in the country, and can one buy a fishing rod here? I don’t think so. “Ah, but that is specialist” one might hear. So if Angling gear is specialist, then so is football kit and there are humungous quantities of that.
These sports shops comply with a formula – a very successful formula, and for that, I do not criticize one jot. The formula relates more to the IMAGE of sport than to the participation. The opportunity to wear the gear, to emulate the star, to bathe in reflected glory of the goal or the victory, and to go out on the town with the designer apparel is what the formula consists of. Throw in a few sporty accoutrements (tennis balls, a treadmill or two to put in the garage) to justify the name and the customers come in droves to buy it all – and a school bag too. Football is celebsville, Angling is not.It’s very simple really and I wish I had thought of it.
But just as the twilight world of the High Street sports shop emerges into light, I am disappointed with my failure to secure the purchase either of a lacrosse stick or a Liquigas shirt to wear on my racing bicycle (four million people watched the opening British stage of the Tour de France – that is approximately seven Premiership Saturdays).
But all is not lost – the twilight world is lightening – I think I shall have a flurry - Ebay USA is auctioning a full sized Olympic Trampoline.
Read more on this product
Related tags for JJB Sports (Shop)
|
|
by (63%):
04.08.2007 18:31
I always thought "JJB trainers" would be a more appropriate name...
03.08.2007 19:21
Another funny review which I looked forward to reading. They do sell snooker cues but that's about it. I agree it's full of trainers and football shirts to bring in they young boys who have plenty of cash to squander. PS some folk have no sense of humour on this site.
03.08.2007 18:02
This review made me chuckle. Nice one.