ATTHEDRIV... 3

ATTHEDRIVEIN

Add to my Circle of Trust

Subscribe to reviews

About me:

Member since:01.01.1970

Reviews:7

Quote-start

Essex jokes

Quote-end
14.09.2002

Advantages:
There funny

Disadvantages:
Unless your from essex

Recommendable Yes:

7 Ciao members have rated this review on average: very helpful See ratings
very helpful by (80%):
  1. pippoodle
  2. RottenPumpkins
  3. Perfection
and 13 other members
helpful by (20%):
  1. Tea-Pots
  2. AdamCristos
  3. Aquarian
and a further member

View all ratings

The overall rating of a review is different from a simple average of all individual ratings.

Share this review on Google+

An Essex girl is crossing the road, when she gets hit by an XR3i. As she is lying on the ground, the driver, Dave, rushes out of the car to see if she is alright. "I'm so sorry luv! I just didn't see ya. Are ya OK?" he blurts out.

"Everyfink is justa blur, I can't see a fing" she says, tearfully.

Concerned, the man leans over the woman to test her eyesight. He asks, "How many fingers have I got up?"

"Ah f**kin 'ell NO!" she screams. "Don't tell me I'm paralyzed from the waist down an all!!!"

---------

Two Essex girls walk up to a perfume counter and pick up a sample bottle, Sharon sprays it on her wrist and smells it, "That's quite nice innit, don't you fink Trace?"

"Yeah, what's it called?"

"Viens a moi

"VIENS A MOI, what the f**k does that mean?"

At this stage the assistant offers some help. "Viens a moi, ladies is French for 'come to me'"

Sharon takes another sniff and offers her arm to Tracey again, saying, "That doesn't smell like come to me Trace.

Does it smell like come to you?"

-------------

An Essex girl goes to the council to register for child benefit.

"How many children?" asks the council worker "10" replies the Essex girl

"10???" says the council worker.. "What are their names?"

"Wayne, Wayne, Wayne, Wayne, Wayne, Wayne, Wayne, Wayne, Wayne and Wayne"

"Doesn't that get confusing?"

"Naah..." says the Essex girl "its great because if they are out playing in the street I just have to shout WAAYNE, YER DINNER'S READY or WAAYNE GO TO BED NOW and they all do it..."

"What if you want to speak to one individually?" says the perturbed council worker.

"That's easy," says the Essex girl... "I just use their surnames"

--------------

An Essex girl and an Irish guy are in a bar when the Essex girl notices something strange about the wellies that the Irish guy's wearing. She says to him "Scuse me mate, I ain't bein fannny ornaffink, but why doz one of your wellies ave an L on it, and the uva one's got an R on it?"

So, the Irish guy smiles, puts down his pint of Guinness and replies,
"Well,oim a little bit tick you see. The one with the R is for me roight foot and the one with the L is for me left foot."

"Cor, blimey!" exclaims the Essex girl, "So THAT'S why me knickers 'ave got C&A on them."
  Write your own review

Share this review on Google+

« Previous review   Next review »

Rate this review »

How helpful would this review be to a person making a buying decision? Rating guidelines

Rate as exceptional

Rate as somewhat helpful

Rate as very helpful

Rate as not helpful

Rate as helpful

Rate as off topic

Write your own review Report a problem with this review’s content

Comments about this review »

Perfection 21.09.2002 16:35

Haha! LOVED them! :oD

Aquarian 15.09.2002 12:36

Very funny jokes will tell them to the hubby.

Johnsie 15.09.2002 06:00

Had me laughing...nice oen...

Add your comment

max. 2000 characters

  Post comment

More reviews »

Review Ratings »

This review of Jokes has been rated:

"very helpful" by (80%):

  1. pippoodle
  2. RottenPumpkins
  3. Perfection

and 13 other members

"helpful" by (20%):

  1. Tea-Pots
  2. AdamCristos
  3. Aquarian

and a further member

The overall rating of a review is different from a simple average of all individual ratings.