Jokes

If my calculations are correct: SLINKY SPRING + ESCALATOR = EVERLASTING FUN

Incompetence is officially at its lowest level since records were lost.

Is it just me, or would you kill people for the kind of download speed that girl from the piracy ad's getting?

Statistically, 6 out of 7 dwarves are not happy.

Christianity: One woman's lie about having an affair that got seriously out of hand.

So what if Jesus turned water into wine...I turned a whole student loan into Vodka once. Your move Jesus...

Like most people my age,
I'm 27

I was reading in the paper today about this dwarf that got pickpocketed.
How could anyone stoop so low?

My wife said I'm too immature and if I don't grow up it's gonna erect a barrier between us.
Ha ha ha, erect.

I just saw that Harry Potter film. A bit unrealistic if you ask me. I mean, a ginger kid with two friends?

I just heard in the news "RAF Tornado crashes on hillside".
This is what happens when you have a advertising slogan like,"you don't have to be a pilot to fly in the RAF".
Well apparently you should be.

My girlfriend was complaining last night that I never listen to her. Or something like that.