Limmericks

There was a young man from Carlisle,
Who laid in the sun for a while,
He said this is silly
I've burnt my willy,
But it sure gave his girlfriend a smile.

At a nudist camp in Dundee,
A lady sat drinking some tea,
Up barked a young pup,
And she dropped her cup,
What a dangerous waste said she.

A pensioner from Abergavenny,
Found he hadn't got a penny,
What I need he said is a wife,
That will brighten up my life,
And married a rich widow named Jenny.

A London fireman called to a house,
A hysterical woman saw a mouse,
She'd slipped getting out of the bath,
Laying naked on the floor he had a laugh,
Best part is she is now his spouse.

There was a young girl from Hitchin,
She loved having sex in the kitchen,
That was always her way,
Often ten times a day,
And still her body was twitchin.