Advantages Sunshine between showers.
I apologise for hi-jacking (yet again) a general category, but the simple fact is this. No two destinations are the same. So general lists, though helpful, do not adequately cover all eventualities.So, if travelling to Scotland this summer, please remember it may be similar to winter in many other parts of this universe.
Here are a few suggestions.
2. Thermal Underwear
Hopefully you won’t need it, and the Scottish Tourist Board will vehemently deny the necessity, at least in the month of July. But a ground frost in the Highland Glens, even in July, is not unknown. This applies especially if you are camping, but is also advisable if you’re doing B&B in some remote Highland parts. Central Heating may consist of a peat fire in the centre of the living room. And of course, it is only lit between the months of October and March. (We have to be environmentally responsible and protect our bogs.)
4. A Spade or Shovel
This is not essential, but common courtesy. Following on from three above, it is the decent thing to do. Dig a hole and bury it.
Goes without saying, really. Even if the sun is shining, chances are the puddles are ankle deep. Also, wellies help you blend in with the locals. Only tourists wear trainers. And if you have a bovine bent – well we won’t go into that, but that’s the wonder of woollies.
Jeans? It is a common misconception that Scots wear kilts. Only Americans visiting Scotland to trace their ancestors wear kilts. And almost always of the wrong tartan. Scots wear jeans and wellies. You don’t want to look like an American tourist, now, do you?
10. Souvenirs from Taiwan.
Before you come to Scotland, you must first visit Taiwan and/or HongKong. And buy your tartan souvenirs cheap. Bring them to Scotland, Take them into the gift shops selling this tat, and tell them how much you paid for them. In a very loud voice. When the shop is full.
Like sunshine follows rain, Aspen follows a rare serious op with a p*ss-take.Which, obviously, is exactly what this is.
Scotland is a beautiful country, full of beautiful people.You will be welcome here, and you will love it.
And if you can't find anyone else to welcome you, though I'm sure you will, email Aspen.
PPS. Thanks to FTC for reminding me - item 12 is a bottle of Glen Ord. It's a damn site cheaper On_the_Continent than it is here!!
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