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Hellzone

Hellzone

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Reviews written

since 05/05/2001

108

Troy (Special Edition) (DVD) 22/06/2004

A lengthy film with a short skirt

Troy (Special Edition) (DVD) Certificate: 15 Runtime: 163min Genre: Action/Adventure/War/Romance/Historical Cast (Main): Julian Glover -Triopas Brian Cox -Agamemnon Nathan Jones -Boagrius Adoni Maropis -Agamemnon's Officer Jacob Smith -Messenger Boy Brad Pitt -Achilles John Shrapnel -Nestor Brendan Gleeson -Menelaus Diane Kruger -Helen Eric Bana -Hector Orlando Bloom -Paris Siri Svegler -Polydora Lucie Barat -Helen's Handmaiden Ken Bones -Hippasus Manuel Cauchi -Old Spartan Fisherman Story overview: Set in 1193 B.C this story of love, hate, arrogance and war portrays the great acienent warrior of the Greeks, Achilles. Achilles a very arogant yet extreemly comfident warrior helps go to war with the rest of the greek nation to take on the famed, Troy a city prided on it's great warriors and protection from the gods. Achilles falls in love with Helen of Troy and no end of greed and disaster follows that. Acting: The acting in this film was very good, i believed every moment of it and as a fan of historical movies/programs i found this a very interesting and exhilerating watch. All of the actors played their part and made the film what it is, i didn't notice any flaws and Brad Pitt was a very good choice for Achilles. Sound: Sound quality and atmosphere in this film were superb it made you really feel like you were there watching over this great battle, done with DTS-ES/Dolby Digital/SDDS. Graphics: Amazing graphics the battle scenes really blew me away, and the ...

Feel the Sound of Harvey Mandel - Harvey Mandel 21/06/2004

Dracula never looked so flower like

Feel the Sound of Harvey Mandel - Harvey Mandel Genre: Action/Adventure/Horror/Fantasy Certificate: 12A Runtime: 132min Cast (Main roles): Hugh Jackman - Van Helsing Kate Beckinsale -Anna Valerious Richard Roxburgh -Count Vladislaus Dracula David Wenham -Carl Shuler Hensley -Frankenstein's Monster Elena Anaya -Aleera Will Kemp -Velkan Kevin J. O'Connor -Igor Alun Armstrong -Cardinal Jinette Silvia Colloca -Verona Josie Maran -Marishka Tom Fisher -Top Hat Samuel West -Dr. Victor Frankenstein Robbie Coltrane -Mr. Hyde Stephen Fisher -Dr. Jekyll (as Stephen H. Fisher) Dana Moravková -Barmaid Zuzana Durdinova -Opera Singer Jaroslav Vízner -Gendarme Marek Vasut -Villager Samantha Sommers -Vampire Child Dorel Mois -Dracula's Ball Performer Marianna Mois -Dracula's Ball Performer Laurence Racine -Dracula's Ball Performer Patrice Wojciechowski -Dracula's Ball Performer Story Outline: During the late 19th century the notorius monster slayer, Van Helsingtravels eastern europe to search out and kill Dracula and his fellow sinisters, Dr Frankenstein, Igor, The Wolfman and Frankenstein's monster (who was created for Dracula). Van Heilsing travels into transelvenia to kill them off once and for all only to be shown hate by the locals, even after killing off dracula's minions. Performance: The acting in this film was quite good, although the graphics and actors could have been chosen a bit more wisely in my opinion, Dracula unlike his portral in many other films was not a scary or mysterious ...

Sagem My X-5 Mobile Handset 27/11/2003

Yet another wannabe

Sagem My X-5 Mobile Handset Having finally had enough of nokias, previously marched my way through a Nokia 402, 3210, 3310 and 8210, and checking out the competition (Siemens M35i) i finally stopped being cheap and decided to go out and buy a Sagem MY-X5, looking at it i thought “0o0o0oo0o0 colour phone” but as i got home, plugged it in, waited 16 hours to charge i was a little dissappointed by what i had bought. The Sagem MY-X5 is packed full of features: - High-resolution 256 colour graphic display (101x80 pixels for a maximum of 8 lines) - Wap 1.2 browser - Enhanced Messaging (EMS: SMS with pictures and sound) - MMS: Multimedia Messaging Service - GPRS 4+1 or 3+2 - Infrared connection - Vibrating device - Hands free - Talk-time:up to 4h - Stand-by time: up to 240h - Battery: Li-ion 720mAh - Weight (battery included): 92g - Size: 105x46x20mm - Volume: 77cm 3 - Hi-Fi ringtones - Screensavers - Wallpapers - Icons - Built-in games - Internal Phone Book: up to 300 - Internal SMS Memory: up to 100 - Redial list/Notebook: up to 20 - Euro converter, calculator Alarm, timer But even with all these features it seems to lack the ability to keep speed or style, i've had the phone now for 8months and little things i've noticed which really are annoying include the following: - Freezing when no siginal can be found or battery low - Hard to customize dictionary for T9 - Games aren't very inventive and don't entertain that well - Takes a while to load the inbox if you have ...

Do you believe in life after death? 20/11/2002

Gotta be better than a smack in the teeth

Do you believe in life after death? Think of a chicken, now remember that a chicken is produced from an egg, and yet an egg is created from a chicken, Now forget everything I just told you and listen to my answer. YES….. kinda….. Bit confused? Well so you should be, my belief in life after death is rather more of a something after death, not so much life as humans describe it, but more of a existence that the human mind / body cannot perceive. You following? Or are you a bit lost? Ok let me explain it a different way, for those of you who believe in ghosts, you know a ghost exists right? But you don’t know how exists? It just does…. The same example can be used with Religion, all religions “know” that a god or a high arcihery exists, but none of them know how, or where. Ok you people should be following at least by now…. Doesn’t matter anyway, the answers yes sorta, I believe in something after death but not so much a life.

Southern Comfort Whisky Liqueur 20/11/2002

Makes the night worth while

Southern Comfort Whisky Liqueur I have no idea about the history of Southern Comfort, apparently its Americas favorite!? Well personally I don’t blame them!!!!! Southern Comfort is the nicest thing in a bottle, a lot nicer than that ever so disgusting Lemon Coke? Probably because Lemon Coke doesn’t have alcohol in it!!! Anyway as I was saying, When I first tried southern comfort it came to me as quite a shock as most Alka pop drinkers won’t be able to take the strength it straight away, packing a whooping 45% ish alcohol volume it really does pack a punch. But after extensive testing ;) you really seem to get used to it, mmmmmm the smooth orangey taste of it. Southern Comfort in the UK currently sells for about £9.99 for 1.5 litres, and is widely known, but not widely liked in the UK. One thing I do suggest though if you drink Alka pops when you go out, don’t drink southern comfort as well, because a few hours later you won’t feel to good, I’ve been violently sick before from doing that. Most people I know who drink Southern Comfort love to drink it with lemonade (some even drink it plain, but most it’s to strong for) personally my favorite mixture of Southern Comfort is one that not many try. Southern Comfort and COKE!!!!! This is one point where Lemon Coke tastes quite nice as mixing it with Southern Comfort make’s the taste absolutely delightful. Anyway, I know it’s not much of an OP but I thought I’d just write it as I wanted to praise Southern Comfort so much  it’s absolutely ...

Bloody Roar: Primal Fury (GameCube) 16/11/2002

Roar For me Baby

Bloody Roar: Primal Fury (GameCube) Bloody amazing is the first thing that came to mind, you put in the disk load it up and away you go, 20 seconds down the line and your ready to play! Bloody Roar Primal Fury is a great come back from the people who brought us Bloody Roar 1,2 and 3!!! Although a great fan of Japanese anime I was a little disappointed with the starting FMV as it’s all in cartoons! Not really showing the full potential of the Gamecube which I think is a priority of any good games designer!. With 8 modes, 16 characters and a whole lot of stages, this truly is a improvement from the old series of Bloody Roar, each character has its own animal morphing ability, allowing them to morph into certain preset animals, of course the animals range quite well from anything like a lion to the great elephant!! Many of the old classical characters are there, such as Yugo the wolf, Alice the Rabbit and Busuzima the Chameleon, as well as loads more! With even greater moves and abilities. The modes are as follows: Arcade Versus Time Attack Survival Team Battle Vs Team Battle Training Com Battle Speed wise again Bloody Roar Primal Fury was not what I expected; it boosts almost 10x the speed of its predecessors, this allowed me to get a whopping 24 hit combo with Yugo…. Graphics as always are absolutely superb although still not quite beating Tekken 4 (one game I hope to see in the near future on the Gamecube), Shadows, reflections and even background activity are all added for brill ...

Burnout (GameCube) 16/11/2002

Burnout - Burning away the competition

Burnout (GameCube) Burnout is a fast paced, exciting feature rich game, but even that said and done it’s not as it could have been. Having recently bought a Gamecube I decided to go out and buy some games, one of which was Burnout, as I started it up with a fairly average loading time of about 5seconds I was already amazed by the graphics!!! So as most people would I went straight into the game. Choose my car and its colour and straight away raced away, I COULDN’T CONTROL IT!!!! It’s insanely realistic, the only car racing game I can safely say I’ve played where the cars are driving on city streets and roads, with traffic coming at you…. With so many cars coming for me and swerving out of my way I decided to go for a few crashes :D (Don’t all lads?). Straight away I destroyed a lorry and two taxis both with instant replays and $50,000+ damage, after this I decided to drive like a Looney (as if I hadn’t started) going 125mph and swerving in and out of cars, lorry’s and buses with one goal in mind…. WINNING!!! Your opponents are extremely tactful and seem to do absolutely anything to make sure you lose, but if you think as they do then you win almost every time! Having won the race I was surprised to see a feature which allows you to replay all those delightful crashes, and save them!!!!! Anyway, moving on this game has a total of 6 cars, 1 Tow Truck, 1 pickup truck and 1 bus. Totaling 9 vehicles in total which to be pretty honest is poor for a racing game! Also Burnout has a fair ...

McDonald´s 30/06/2002

Macdonald's - Fast food gone a miss

McDonald´s When I was young (I know it was only about 6 years ago) I used to believe MacDonald’s was the best place in the world, this was before I got note of their technology, cleanliness and generally poor service. Recently I have started working in KFC, in Bristol on Winterstoke road near the football grounds and my average service time for the majority of orders is about 2 minutes, depending on time of day and current health status (how tired I am) it can range from anything between 40seconds and 4minutes, And on really bad days 6 minutes (usually when we have no chicken up). But when I go into most Macdonald’s I’ve been waiting on average 5 minutes for my meal, which by all standards is not fast food! Another thing I have noticed recently occurring in Macdonald’s is their ever-increasing amount of flies, on the equipment and around the food areas. This surely cannot be healthy! And seeming as they have food products all over the store would it not be advisable to have more than just one electronic flytrap? And finally the size of the burgers etc, compared to those in the adverts or on their signs is proportionally very much smaller! Couldn’t this be taken as some form of false advertising? I mean you buy what you see; it’s the consumer’s way. I do not recommend Macdonald’s to anyone until they can control their pest problems and perhaps consider making their burgers and food products a lot larger and so they taste more natural, rather than some synthetic impression.

Jay And Silent Bob (DVD) 30/06/2002

They Should of both Stayed silent in my opinion

Jay And Silent Bob (DVD) Jay and Silent Bob? Sometimes I wished he they would have both stayed silent through out the whole movie, the problem with this movie is it does seem to portray far to much effort into the ‘Jokes’ so when something was meant to be funny it was either just idiotic or plain stupid. Jay and Silent Bob Strike back is a fair story line, but to be honest a bit boring, It’s all about these two guys ‘Jay and Silent Bob’ (Obviously) who go to Hollywood, to receive money for the recent rip off, of their comic book ‘Butt man and Chronic’ (been a lot of those recently?) In their eccentric journeys to try and get to Hollywood they meet a Hitch Hiker who seems content on giving men oral pleasure, they try to give oral to a nun and they steal a monkey all at the same time as Jay falling in love with a jewel thief. To be honest the humour in this is quite tasteless and very dry, but there are a few amusing parts in it even if there is a bit of racism, and religious discrimination. If the actors actually paid more attention to the movie in progress rather than their own asses and just lost it, perhaps the whole film would have been far more amusing for the immediate viewer, but as such they put to much effort into something that they obviously hadn’t studied and ripped off a lot of movies, with their jokes. Fortunally the graphics could of saved this film along with the sound, but then what’s a film without a decent story line? They even managed to get the skin tight clothed ...

Resident Evil (DVD) 30/06/2002

Resident Evil - Yet another great in the series

Resident Evil (DVD) When I recently visited America, I went and saw the movie Resident Evil… And when watching it, the first thing that came to mind was ‘amazing!’. Resident evil the movie is in detail about a mansion with a secret underground research facility going by the name ‘Umbrella’, this company for years had created genetic weapons for various different countries. The new in line was the creation of a virus. The T-Virus!, this virus was designed with the intention to create indestructible soldiers, when infact it created the well known ‘Zombie’. After the release of this virus the S.T.A.R team are assigned to isolate and destroy this incident as quickly as possible, Firstly they enter the building finding the head security officer ‘Alice’ lost for memory, slowly but surely throughout the film she regains it, and I have to say she puts up some pretty impressive fighting scenes. Slowly but surely they come into some danger, by the ‘Red Queen’ (the facilities front line defence against intruders), whose main goal is to destroy all those who are infected by this virus. Unfortunally this Artificial Intelligence does not realize until near enough the last minute that the people she is destroying are infact there to aid her. This film basically portrays the same story line as the game, except in the game there is no Red Queen and the range of enemies are far greater, (Probably to enhance game play) the S.T.A.R Team members and also the head of security are: Alice - Milla ...

Spider-Man (DVD) 30/06/2002

Spiderman - Yet another Great comic book rip

Spider-Man (DVD) Sheer brilliance comes to mind when watching the film Spiderman, when I first started watching this I thought it was yet another love story, in which the geek becomes the prince charming, seems by the end I was right. Spiderman the movie is about this young lad named Peter Parker (Tobey Maguire) who’s one wish seems to have the strength and power to stick up for himself and to get the girl of his dreams, Mary Jane (Kirsten Dunst), this is very well portrayed from the comics and cartoon series, except for the simply rubbish catch phrases, such as “With great power comes great responsibility” where as it used to be catch phrases such as “My Spider Sense’s are tingling” (great catch phrase), When taking a trip to a science research facility, which research’s into the different forms of spider and also has created several genetic super spiders, one such spider gets loose and as Peter Parker is searching for something he has dropped. The mutation bites him and slowly but surely Peter Parker changes into Spiderman, his comical creation. As in all comic book hero style films, there’s always a bad guy and in this film case there is no exception, Spiderman’s main enemy is Norman Osborne, also known as the ‘Green Goblin’ (Willem Dafoe), who as his company is slowly taken down decides to go through certain genetic experiments intended to improve his strength, speed etc (you can probably guess where it goes from there) The one thing about this film I am proud to see was the ...

Sega Saturn 26/06/2002

Sega Saturn - Blast from the past

Sega Saturn Since the release of their ‘Sega Saturn’ Sega Inc have been shunned and put down every step of the way except for their exceptional quality of games which they have now published for other consoles, but these insults were not fair as after buying a Sega Saturn for only £20 second hand, I was astonished by the quality at which it was made. Although the Sega Saturn is slightly bulky (No more so than the X-Box, or should I say ‘X-Bulk’) I consider it a brilliant console, the GUI (General User Interface) when you turn it on without a CD in, is superb to begin with, as it has a wide range of settings allowing you to configure the console almost down to each resistor. The graphics on this system aren’t exactly great, infact I’d say the rendering of each image is very bad indeed, but it still doesn’t mean the games aren’t good for a laugh, I mean you still play your Playstation don’t you? And compared this console is a complete antique even if it was brought out in the same year. The Game play is brilliant in my opinion, the control pads are well designed so you can play for hours on end without hurting your wrists or fingers, and the range of games is phenomenal, On this console just as the Playstation there are titles such as Resident Evil, Magic Carpet, Alien Trilogy, Street Fighter Alpha and Firestorm Thunder hawk 2. But also in addition to these great titles you can get a feel of the Sega way of life with games such as, Virtua Fighter, Virtual Cop, Sonic The Hedgehog ...

Telewest (Blueyonder) 14/12/2001

Taking you to yonder hills

Telewest (Blueyonder) With good cheap, quick and easy setup Telewest broadband is a brilliant broadband service. After being completely fed up of 56 kilobit internet service, my parents and I decided it to be a good time to switch to broadband which was 512kilobit apposed to 56. Telewest broadband costs £25 a month and the service is great, after taking few hours to get it setup, I phoned up Telewest as the service was a bit slow, they gave me great customer service and we were back at downloads of 60k/s, our average download speed is about 35k/s and before ive even downloaded at 142k/s!!!!! Telewest have no problem with you networking your connection to multiple computers and also have no problems with using your computer as a web server on their service either. Services included with this package: Free 15meg web space Free @blueyonder.co.uk email address Max of 5 Mac addresses (Would recommend using a proxy apposed to a hub) 512kilobit broadband connection Free customer service I’ve heard if you do not have a network card then set –up can cost up to £75 but for us it cost a mere £25 as we got an offer through the post and we also had 2 network cards. Great service, although can sometimes be slow, once your with them you won’t really want to go back with a narrowband connection (talking from experience).

Paint Shop Pro 7.0 Complete package 27/10/2001

Paint Shop for Pros - Redone op

Paint Shop Pro 7.0 Complete package Paint shop pro 7, although confusing at the start to get to grips with, is an excellent art package for even the beginner, when I first bought this I thought it’d be just like the other psp’s (Paint shop pros) and very easy to get to grips with, but with the new addition of layers it made it fairly hard and confusing but in a way much more advanced and a lot more versatile in it’s use. Features - Seems to be able to open almost any file format, weather it be a jpeg or a tiff it just opens it. - Many graphical effects to many your image superbly professional looking - Browsing function, allowing you to browse a folder full of images of different formats to find the one you want with little thumbnails (small images) of the images contained in that directory or drive - Save as function allowing you to save in many different image formats - Many useful tools to select from - Fast loading and saving of images, Paint Shop Pro 7 managed to open a 46meg bitmap in less than 5seconds which is something “Paint” can’t seem to manage. This program is literally cram packed with features, to many to even mention. Effects - Blur - Gaussian Blur - Motion Blur - Soften - Sharpen - Unsharp Mask - Dilate - Edge enhance - Erode - Find edges - Trace contour - Add noise - Despeckle - Edge preserving smooth - Median filter - Salt and pepper filter - Texture preserving smooth - Buttonize - Aged newspaper - Black ...

Resident Evil 2 (PlayStation) 27/10/2001

Umbrella Made the Mistake again....

Resident Evil 2 (PlayStation) This follows on in the great glory, which was Resident Evil and Resident Evil Directors cut. Resident evil 2 is basically the story of a City named "Racoon City" which gets infected by the G-Virus, which was produced by the same people who made the T-virus in Resident Evil 1, Umbrella. Both the G and T virus were designed to create differential humans and animals, basically making everything it infected eventually into a superior self or a zombie of some kind. In the first resident evil, Claire and the other S.T.A.R.S members were stuck in Umbrellas corporate mansion where the initial testing had began, unfortunally there was an outbreak of the T-virus and almost the whole mansion was infected. In Resident Evil 2 Umbrella had continued research on the virus (for some strange reason? Have they no humanity?) and produced the G-Virus which was designed specifically to create a super human, able to replicate simply and quickly. Unfortunally the creator (of whom I have forgotten the name) was infected and became that super Human, and along the way the rest of Racoon city was infected by the G-virus, turning the whole city into a complete freak fest. Characters In this game you play as either Leon (a new LAPD member) or Claire (one of the old S.T.A.R.S team members) each having your own abilities and disabilities (Apparently). Features - Superb 3D graphics - Brilliant Chilling Sound Effects - Great although sometimes confusing Camera Angles - 3 levels of ...
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