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Sweep1

Sweep1

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Reviews written

since 12/05/2001

32

BBC1: Eurovision Song Contest 29/05/2002

Top Totty, Transvestites and Terry

Top 10 Foods 12/05/2002

Meat and two veg

Tremors 2 - Aftershocks (DVD) 12/05/2002

Awfully enjoyable

ViaVoice Pro 7.0 Complete package 11/05/2002

Talking the talk

ViaVoice Pro 7.0 Complete package Recently I did a very foolish thing. I tried to use some technology to make something easier and quicker. Anybody who's ever tried anything similarly unwise will know where this going. I often wonder whether most 'labour saving technologies' are actually whizzed up by some evil aspiring mad scientist (presumably with a large but dumb assistant named Igor). The trick is that setting up whatever technology you have acquired always takes far longer than doing the job itself would and then (and here's the really cunning part) it doesn't do the job. My particular stupidity was to attempt to relieve myself of all that bothersome typing by using a voice dictation package - this one to be precide. These things sound wonderful - you just sit back, relax and dictate in a clear slowish voice and your essay miraculously appears on screen without all the usual spelling mistakes - what could be better? But first I had to 'train' the package to accept my own ringing tones as the base for its calculation. Thus I read out about 150 phrases off the screen and provided they sort of made sense to the package all was fine. Then I had the option of making the package even more effective by reading another 200 or so sentences. Why not? Thought I. May as well make sure it's really efficient. And so it was with a true sense of excitement and anticipation that having fully trained the software I stood by to speak my first sentence of choice. Appreciating the history of the moment I said 'It's one ...

Marijuana 10/05/2002

Beating about the Bush

Everything that starts with W ... 09/05/2002

War and Popcorn

Zulu (DVD) 06/05/2002

Cos we're 'ere lad

10 Worst Foods 28/04/2002

Pigswill is the answer...

How to rate and comment 24/04/2002

It's not just size, it's what you do with it

Is capital punishment wrong? 21/04/2002

In a word...Yes

10 Best Actors 20/04/2002

Friends, Romans, Countrymen...

McDonalds [TV Advertisement] 16/04/2002

Mcdubious

Top 10 Films of the Decade 16/04/2002

Gosh, now you're asking again

I truly meant to pick 10 films all from the last decade. Unfortunately I ran out of recent films I liked quite quickly. After 3 in fact. So I decided to throw category headings to the wind and just do my top 10 films of all time because, lets face, most films were much better 30 years ago! Except that as ever all attempts to reduce 11 to 10 completely failed as all would have meant missing out something truly worthy of inclusion or Tremors II, neither of which was an acceptable option. 9 of them won no OSCARs (including all the top 5) and the other two won 14 between them. So make of that what you will... 11 Tremors II (1995) “I feel, I was denied, critical, need-to-know, in-for-ma-tion" Half of the original cast, including Kevin Bacon who had moved onto better things, refused to take part in this sequel (which leads to a series of ever more improbable ways of writing characters out), the lines are cheesy and the plot just a re-hash of the original. Which makes its place in my Top 10 somewhat improbable. The thing is despite its basic lack of quality this film is immensely entertaining – it’s funny and it’s full of action. Barry Norman probably wouldn’t like it but I do. 10 Reservoir Dogs (1992) “Somebody just shoved a red hot poker up our ass and I want to know who’s name is on the handle” Tarantino’s best film set in the aftermath of a failed robbery. Full of good acting, lots of swearing and a fair bit of violence too but its all relevant to the plot. ...

10 Worst Films of the Decade 15/04/2002

A pile of pants

Top 10 TV Programs ever 15/04/2002

When I was a lad...

...TV Programmes were interesting and didn't have you reaching for the remote after 5 minutes. Well OK actually most of them did but at least there were SOME good ones on... Which is probably why most of this little lot of programmes that stopped their runs ages ago. Because if TV was actually worth watching then...well you can only imagine the consequences for a stable and orderly society. At least this seems to be the logic but I digress...The Top 10: 10 Red Dwarf (1988-98) Very funny Sci-fi sitcom with lots of Mickey taking of any series or film with Star in the title. Dave Lister goes into stasis and wakes 3 million years later to find himself the last surviving human with only a ships computer called Holly, Rimmer, a hologram and ‘Cat’, a being evolved from, well erm cats, for company. In later series they are joined by an android with an ironing fetish. No honestly it is actually really funny! They do most of the things you’d expect of a sci-fi series – visiting parallel universes, battling aliens, meeting alternate version of themselves plus a few other slightly less usual things like battling a Curry Monster and joining forces with Mother Teresa and Elvis to battle the evil forces of The Boston Strangler and James Last on a world populated with waxworks. The only thing that stops this series placing higher is that it went downhill a little in the most recent series with the departure of Rimmer (Chris Barrie) in series 7. He came back for the following series ...
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