For those that want the full tale…..
♣ MY SMOKING HISTORY ....BY FAG ASH LIL.....
I started smoking when I was 15 because I thought it was cool...hahahahahaha 'coz coughing is cool right? And coughin' leads to coffin….errrr Dracula is cool isn't he? Anyway it was ok because I didn't smoke JPS ..and EVERYONE knew that they made your throat bleed…but black cats were…..Errrr anywaaaay…..
♣ MY ATTEMPTS AT QUITTING..... BY MISS NO WILL POWER…
My first attempt at quitting was to switch to menthol then eventually stop….hahahahahahaha right….. so that was how it came to that I smoked menthol fags…..
My second attempt was using a patch…..but hmm shall we say that the less traumatic of my dreams involved a goat….. we don't even want to go to the really bad dreams...suffice to say, the patch was immediately ripped off.
My third attempt was when I was pregnant (bad, bad crap mother) - they don't allow you to use any kind of nicotine replacement when you are pregnant…in case it harms the baby…errrr like fags don't? So attempt 3 was cold turkey…..I was nearly arrested in Sainsbury's for trying to ram someone into the freezers with my trolley…because they were dawdling….. I went outside and had a fag (yes, yes I know- but luckily my babies were huge and very healthy) Incidentally there is a group on face book called "I Secretly Want To Punch Slow Walking People In The Back Of The Head"…hmmm maybe I should have joined…..
Fourth attempt….after seeing the
blood pressure monitor go through the roof after a cigarette and being too weak to walk after a blood transfusion ….I tried those imitation cigarettes that you puff on…..but they made me choke
Fifth attempt….patches again…a different one this time…they made me dizzy so I took it off for 10 mins and my lovely (now ex) boyfriend kept lighting cigarettes and leaving them in ashtrays in front of me then walking off…..
My sixth attempt was the best I ever did….I went for hypnotherapy…it was ace… it was also expensive (about 14 packs of cigarettes) ….I lasted 4 weeks…and I really, really didn't want one…..until I had a pile of abuse off my ex …… Part of it was to replay the tape of the session every night….which my partner used to giggle reciting it all word for word …. until she started counting down then boom fast asleep… I still play it every now and then when I can't sleep …."Now then Jess…just get niiiice and comfy………
Attempt number seven… After visiting the chemist for something for my leg and her telling me "I wouldn't worry about your leg…but I would worry about your chest…. you are an asthmatic smoker and you sound as though you have the first stages of Chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD)"…. I shat myself and tried Chewing gum….this was good for reducing cigarettes as they could be replaced with nicotine gum…..but my jaw ached and I was fed up of looking like a chav. I tried the lozenges (without reading the instructions) and kept going dizzy so I just thought hey I must just have to carry on smoking (amazing what a smoker will tell themselves to justify a cigarette)
TA DA ATTEMPT NUMBER 8…..My sister came on MSN at work and told me her mate (my age) was in hospital with COPD and an oxygen mask….suddenly I realised that if I don't stop smoking NOW then that would be me. I put my fag out at 10.35am and put a NiQuitin CQ lozenge in my mouth. I haven't looked back.
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♣ HOW IT WORKED BY MISS THIS IS A DODDLE
I started off on the 4mg lozenges….you shove it in your mouth and suck…I have the mint ones as they taste nicer than the normal although I quite like both. And they both give a lovely kick at the back of my throat….a bit like the buzz of a cigarette crossed with a dose of minty pepper. A lozenge lasts between 30 minutes and an hour and you can rest it between your cheek and gum for a break….I like to put mine under my tongue until it goes all chalky then have a suck fest. The 4mg ones are for people who have a cigarette within 30 mins of waking…or like me…30 seconds after opening my eyes…(which works out at about 2 hours Before actually waking …I don't do mornings OK?!) I started on about 12-15 a day (15 being the absolute max per day) for about 3 weeks then I reduced them slowly over 3 weeks to 8-10 per day. After another week (7 in total) I reduced the lozenges to the 2mg ones and carried on taking the same amount. After 12 weeks you should be able to stop taking them…..except nearly 20 weeks on I haven't quite managed to wean myself off them.
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♣ MY SIDE EFFECTS.... BY MISS RATTY SPOTTY HOBGOB THE GLITMORPH
A week into no smoking I cried at the sight that met me in the mirror…I was 13 again…I was spotty and I mean SPOTTY. This lasted for about 6 weeks.
After 2 weeks along with the spots I suddenly kept getting mouth ulcers. I went to the chemist…the lovely lady said that my body was having a major detox…which kind of shows just how much crap smoking puts into your body and how long it takes to clear it away.
The dizziness I had encountered on a previous quitting attempt was simply because I had smoked as well which you cannot do while using lozenges - I have had no dizziness while using lozenges and not smoking.
I found that from about the 2nd week my throat kept going phlegmy and while I was mid sentence by voice would just stop (Hallelujah shouted my other half…and half the people I know). This lasted for a good 6-8 weeks and was intermittent. I asked the chemist (while buying more lozenges my voice stopped after "can I have") and she explained that because smoking burns away all the hairs in your windpipes when you stop they are growing back and everything gets trapped on them. As my body was producing copious amount of phlegm this was what was sticking to them. This stage had its plus sides….sometimes I sounded really husky and I could sing along to Bonnie Tyler and Dolly Parton (Yikes did I just admit that?)
When I reduced them down to 2mg I felt as though I had really bad PMT for a couple of days…but everyone was really sweet (to my face) and put up with my crabbiness (then bitched about me as soon as I left the room. I know this - I recorded them )
At first I was really pleased - I regained my lovely bust and pert butt…although I was soon to realise that they came as part of a set which also included tummy and thighs… in 4 ½ months I have put on 1 ½ stone….but you know what? I can lose it …I can dance it away….I can and I will….I have been jogging on the spot while doing my ironing (who cares if everyone's clothes look crumpled and I ironed my tummy…well actually I do, but that's besides the point) whereas I cannot get back the years I have reduced my life by through smoking.
I think that smoking speeds up your metabolism (so you live faster and die quicker) and that it just takes a while to stabilize it again as I know I haven't replaced cigarettes with food (much).
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♣ THEY WORKED FOR ME - WILL THEY WORK FOR YOU BY.... SHE'S A WINNER
I think they worked for me because I truly wanted to stop smoking which is the key to quitting. They were my favourite lozenge out of all the brands as the texture is kind of chalky whereas all the other feel like you a sucking a slimy slug…..
You should really consult your doctor before using any kind of medication and chances are if you attend a couple of counselling sessions you will be able to get these lozenges on prescription.
I am not going to tell you what the box says…as if you want to quit you will go and stand in the shop and read it yourself. I am not going to tell you what is on the information leaflet inside either….mainly because I am too scared to read it ( I am one of these people who are totally crap at taking any kind of medication because I am scared of the side effects - so I decided not to read them then I cant suffer them). I am also not a chemist so don't understand the ingredients and am certainly not qualified to recommend you take them or talk about the possible side effects that an individual person may or may not have….myself I was irresponsible and I used my usual policy of suck it and see.
It does tell you somewhere on the pack that you shouldnt eat or drink while taking...but this is as it reduces the efectiveness...so i continued to swig my gold blend whilst sucking away.
There is a card in each box with a phone number and email address for Click2Quit …where you can get help to quit smoking. They will apparently give you a free individually tailored stop smoking plan. (Again I didn't use as I didn't want to hear it…I did it on my own - but this will help some people immensely)The hardest thing for me was breaking the habit of doing something ie smoking. There were certain times (like after a meal) or certain places (my car) when I always had a cigarette and suddenly I had to find something else to do…. I chose picking my nose - well I already bite my nails and my new car has tinted windows. Oh and cleaning…I am a regular scrubber now and seem to spend half my life cleaning, for e.g. Instead of sitting down with a brew and a fag after tea I wash up straight away then sit down with a brew and an ice-cream…. Hmmm what did I say about replacing with food?
I sometimes thought of a fag as a mate as you turn to them when you are stressed and times are bad....but with friends like this who needs enemies. That said you do still go through a kind of mourning process for the loss of something that has been a regular part of your life for so long.
My only gripe is that there is no 1mg lozenge so from 2 mg you then have to make the step of NO nicotine…which my temper is struggling with.
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♣ HOW MUCH ARE THEY AND WHERE CAN I GET THEM FROM BY ....MISS I SHOULD BE LOADED BUT I AM NOT...wonder if its anything to do with the 20 new pairs of shoes...…
They are available on the shelf and over the counter in Boots and most chemists and supermarkets. (Except strangely not Somerfield …which I found out after driving 20 miles round looking for a shop that sells them while away for the weekend)
The price varies from shop to shop but you are looking at about £12 for a box of 72 and £7.30 for a box of 36. In context I was using a box of 72 about every 4-5 days in the first few weeks so less than £15 per week in comparison to over £35 in cigarettes and in the latter weeks a box of 36 is lasting a week. Boots regularly have offers on and they can also be bought with Boots points.
They are made by GlaxoSmithkline
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♣ MY LIFE AS A NON SMOKER... BYMISS HEY LOVE YOU SMELL GORGEOUS
Straight away I noticed that I could smell and taste things better and I could smell cigarettes on people that I just passed in the street…and it stinks like a filthy ashtray (ewww was that me?)
I feel somewhat fitter…but I did a lot of damage…its going to take a long time to repair.
I don't want a cigarette at all and other people smoking doesn't bother me in the slightest (thank gawd I haven't turned into one of those awful antismoking nags…you know ex smokers are the worst)
One of the best things though was the other day a bloke said to me, right out of the blue…."you smell gorgeous love" he went on with his business but I was pleased as punch…..well Black Cashmere is hard to find..and is wasted covered in the L'au d'fagtray.
♣♣♣ My best advice for quitting smoking is "DON'T START!" One more thing to say ........I did it I did it nr nr nr :-P
Update...it took me about12 months to get off the lozenges.....but I am still off the fags...and feeling much much healthier for it.
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