Diagnosed with an aggressive cancer of the right lung on my 58th birthday (14th July) So not really ...
Diagnosed with an aggressive cancer of the right lung on my 58th birthday (14th July) So not really in the humour for writing much at the moment, although I *WILL* be back before too long...Ken
Member since:06.12.2000
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~ ~ OK. This op is a first for the “mad cabbie”, so I’m trusting you lot to be gentle with me when it comes to the ratings!!!! Picture the scene. There’s Ken, having his customary morning shower to start off his day. He’s just washed all the body parts, and applied the conditioner to his flowing locks (well, maybe not so flowing these days, but you’re allowed SOME illusions) to keep them in tip-top condition. Now he has to wait a few minutes to give all the ingredients in the conditioner (possible op to follow, depending on the response to this one!!) time to work their magic, so he’s gentling humming a wee tune to himself, and luxuriating under the stream of lovely hot water. (I love showers; MUCH better than baths, where I always think you’re lying in your own dirty water) His eye catches a container sitting in one of the corner units above the bath, and being a totally uncontrollable reader, he grabs it to read what it is and what it is supposed to do. “Hmmmm. Oil of Olay Moisturising Body Wash. That’s
a new one. The wee one and her mum must have been scouring the shelves in the local chemist again. And what’s this little sponge thingy for, I wonder?”
~ ~ So it was over to the back of the container to illicit some more info. “We can prove your skin can feel soft and smooth”, it proclaims. “Use just one dash of OlayMoisturising Body Wash on the puff to clean your whole body, and experience skin that feels soft and smooth, every single day,” it goes on to add. OK. So it’s not a sponge, it’s a puff, (original) and you’re supposed to put a dab on and wash yourself down with it, for a truly wonderful, silky smooth, skin.
~ ~ Now any of you who have read my golfing ops, and who also know that I am a taxi-driver, will realise that I spend an awful lot of my waking hours exposed to the elements, whether it be sunshine, or as is more common here in Ireland, the liquid variety of the same. The sun in particular plays havoc with my skin, especially on my face and arms. Although I am fortunate in hardly ever getting sun burnt, it does tend to leave my skin feeling very dry and flaky, even when I apply a low sun factor sun lotion every morning. So I’m tempted to give it a try. I am SORELY tempted to give it a try. But moisturiser for men!!!!!
~ ~ Let’s get one thing straight from the start. I may be from the “old school” of thinking, but I’m not so hidebound that I won’t use deodorant or toothpaste. Basic hygiene is VERY important to this mad cabby. But moisturiser for men!! “Holy God, if herself ever finds out she’ll think I’ve turned funny”, is my immediate thought. So it’s a quick flip of the top to see what it smells like, in case I end up going about all day reminding my customers in the taxi of a rose garden. Can you imagine? “ Hey, Mary. What’s that pong coming off your man. Has he got perfume on, or what?” Or the ribbing I would take of my taxi-driver mates when they sat in the cab for a natter when it is quiet on the ranks. “Hey Ken. Had ‘Fitzwilliam Jane’ in the car again, have we?” (Fitzwilliam Jane is a notorious “lady of the night”, who often has the habit of offering alternative methods of payment when she uses a taxi, and uses VERY strong perfume!!! God help you if you’re the next customer in the taxi after she’s got her run home!!)
~ ~ But no. This stuff actually smells fine, and not at all overtly feminine in nature. It simply smells “clean” and fresh. So the decision is taken to give it a try. (I’m nothing if not adventurous) “AAAArrrrrGGGGhhhhhh. What’s this!!!!” On squeezing the container gently to produce the requisite small dab of the body wash, the damn thing has shot out enough stuff to clean down the 1st Battalion of the Scots Guards after a field exercise. (Proctor and Gamble please note!!!)
~ ~ This mess sorted, I now proceed to lash the stuff on all over. “Cor. That feels LOVELY. Kind of soapy and slinky at the same time” (Whoa boy, don’t get carried away here!!) So it’s back under the shower, and off it comes, before I start to enjoy it TOO much.
~ ~ So did it work? Damn right it did. My skin felt GREAT the whole day, even after a nine-hour shift in the old cab, in sweaty and humid weather conditions. I didn’t need to apply my usual sun lotion to my arms to stop them getting dry and flaky, especially my right arm that spends most of the time propped up on the window when I’m driving. I kept that “just stepped out of the shower” feeling for the whole day, and didn’t get a single, solitary wisecrack from anyone about smelling like a ladies boudoir. Even when I somewhat hesitantly mentioned it to “her indoors” that evening, I was surprised at the reaction. A simple, “Yep. It’s smashing, isn’t it?” with no aspersions cast upon my manhood. So guess what. I’ve been using it ever since, and it gets a very high recommendation from the “mad cabbie”. (I’m not THAT mad; I know when I’ve found a good ‘un)
~ ~ As I mentioned in passing earlier, it’s made (in France) by Proctor and Gamble. A cross examination of herself revealed that it comes in two sizes. 200ml or 400ml, and that we had the larger size that cost €6.35 at the local chemist. I would imagine that if you’re into saving the old pennies, then it would be possible to find it cheaper in some of the discount supermarkets, or in the likes of Superdrug on the old Internet. The bottle gives a little more information as well. It is “pff balanced”, and “Dermatologically tested”, whatever that means. There is also a large section telling you all the ingredients that went into the manufacture, but since this is double dutch to me, and probably to most of you, I’m not going to bore the pants off you by listing them all here All I know or care about is that it does what it promises. No complaints here, except for that mini flood of lotion when I squeezed the container.
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