Poems of anger and rage > Reviews (65)

After I had gone through the grief of losing my husband of 26 years and widowed for 4 lonely years I met a guy who 'did' it for me! I went into that relationship blind, gullible, vulnerable, trusting and perhaps a bit naively. When it ended, the way it did, I was left with so many questions of Why?? Which I never ever got answers to. A lot of hurt was caused to me and my family and a rift occurred between me and my family and friends.
It took 2 years to resolve the issues caused by him.
I wanted to find 'closure' so made a booklet of the poems I wrote for him. I have put here the first poem I wrote (even though it's not about anger!) and the last one out of the 100 I wrote for him. (Which is!). I've also included one about the situation it left me in. The relationship lasted for 18 months.
I have since gone on to meet and marry a wonderful, loving man who deserves the love I have to give.

Crazy I am to feel this way
when I only met you the other day
I never knew what my future would hold
didn't know I could be so bold.
Meeting you took me by surprise
that way I felt when I looked in your eyes
the slow dances that we shared
made me wonder, if you too cared.
My hand in yours fits like a glove
seems like a miracle sent from above.
That kiss so tender and so sweet
were you aware of my rapid heartbeat?
I don't know whether it's right or wrong
to feel for you, so soon, this strong
so strong, it takes my breath away
makes me quiver all over in a funny way.
You've opened up a closed down heart
your laugh, it played a major part
restoring feelings way down deep
I only pray they're here to keep.
I thought my life was mapped out for me
to be sad and lonely was all I could see
You changed all that with a fleeting touch
made me aware of what I'd missed so much.
Could it be we were meant to be?
two lonely hearts to beat in harmony
to help heal our bygone pain
and found that 'special person' once again.
to share companionship, be a friend
a chance for us to find love again
to build another life together
one that would last forever and ever.

The Last One I Write for A Tosser!

I wished he were hurt - I wished he'd dropped dead!
I wished that he'd never have messed with my head
He made me believe it was me in the wrong
because of just loving him for so long.
He took it for granted, the love that I gave
he made me so nearly end up in my grave!
He may not have hit me or thrown me about
what he did was worse - he just walked on out.
He left when I really needed him by my side
where was my boyfriend when I found out he'd lied?
The going got rough - and I was dismissed
he just took his leave of me and went and got pissed!
He couldn't handle it - when the shit hit the fan
so he left me broken hearted, alone with no man.
How could he do that - has he ever asked why?
Leave the woman who loved him and that is no lie.
But seeing his cowardness - left me stone cold
I saw the light - and in it he really looked old.
I loved and I trusted him with all my heart
didn't think we would ever end up apart.
When he said he'd marry me - bought me the ring
then wouldn't put it on - should have told me something.

But no, I believed him when he said 'give it time -
to let all things settle' before he would be mine.
I should have known then - it was only for show
He lied about loving me - he just wanted to go.
He's such a sad loser, a wanker as well
who puts on the charm so we women can't tell
but I can see through him - I now know of his fame
but everyone will know now - Beware!............
Steve Conway's the name!!

Sorry about the swearing - not!!

The consequences

It's one of those days when I got nothing done
just feel so down, unloved and alone
where's all my family - where's all my friends?
so suddenly my social life came to an end.

The fact I'm an outcast - causes nothing but pain
will I ever feel loved and happy again?
something will always be missing - always a gap
cos my dear little grandson can't sit on my lap.

He'll never know me or give me a smile
I won't see his first steps - or see him run a mile
I won't be a part of all of their lives
nothing will change - and it cuts like a knife.

I was such a proud grandma - I was over the moon!
but it's been taken away from me all too soon
I made a mistake, did something wrong
and I'm to be punished for I don't know how long.

I can only see photo's of how big he's grown
and to feel how heavy he's got - is something unknown
I cannot push him around in his pram
or offer to baby-sit him whenever I can.

I'm just denied any part of a grandma's joy
for four months I haven't set eyes on my dear little boy
do they think I have a heart made of stone?
that it doesn't affect me now I'm out on my own.

If I could just see him and hold him awhile
to see his dear little face break into a smile
my life would have some sort of meaning again
instead of just feeling so hurt and in pain.

Thankfully, I am now in contact again. When it all happened my grandson was just 4 months old - and I didnt see him till he was nearly two and a half years old!