Member Advice on Coping with Death

This is a hard op for me to write, so forgive me for being sad while I write this, ok ? In 1994, I met and married a wonderful man, Shayne. We met in March, started going out together in June, and married in November. we knew we were meant to be together. I fell pregnant in the September, before we got married. I didn't have an easy pregnancy, I had high blood pressure all the way through it. 1995 came, and on 25th April, my back waters broke, but ...
...I stayed in the hospital, and on 15th May, they let me out, even though I was only 4 days away from delivery. 17th May, they had me back in, and started me off. They gave me a pessiary, to soften my cervix, and bring labour on. The reason for this was, when they took my blood pressure, they found it to be way too high, and did a scan. The scan showed, that the placenta was looking 'old'. I still do not understand that, even now. My waters broke ...

Aussieme1106 08.08.2004 · Read full review
Ciao members have rated this review on average: exceptional
Review of Member Advice on Coping with Death

To cope with death is one thing, but how do you cope when you know months in advance that a person is slowly dying and there is nothing you can do about it? Well everyone copes in there own way. There is no right or wrong and no time limit on grieving. So all I can do is share with you how I coped together with some advice that hopefully you might be able to relate to in some way and find helpful. 3 months ago my mother in-law died from cancer. ...
...it was long enough for me to feel close enough to her to call her 'mum', (something which at first I found very difficult to do). So for the rest of this review I shall refer to her as mum. My mum's cancer was first diagnosed back in 1977, and from that point onwards she battled with cancer for a further 28yrs. Her main form of cancer was bone cancer, but she had also suffered breast cancer as well. When I first met mum and found out she had cancer ...

saraha007 01.08.2005 · Read full review
Ciao members have rated this review on average: exceptional
Review of Member Advice on Coping with Death

I find myself in a pretty good position to write this review as my Mum died very unexpectedly on 2nd May this year . In a way I thought it might help me , as well as others who are going through or will go through this experience sometime soon . And as always I rely on my Ciao therapists to both allow and tolerate my outpourings . Strictly speaking I have no advice to give ... this is simply an account of my own personal experiences . I think ...
........ there is no right or wrong way to deal with death and grief , only your way ... whatever is right for you and whatever gets you through it . Find something , anything , to hold on to or to look forward to . As long as you feel something you are alive . ---------------------------------------------------------------------- ------------------------ For me , death came right out of the blue . My Mum was 78 , no great age these days , and ...

Janej47 06.06.2008 (03.07.2008) · Read full review
Ciao members have rated this review on average: very helpful
Review of Member Advice on Coping with Death

I have thought long and hard about writing this so here goes. Forgive me this might be long. I felt I had been given my life back after undergoing a barrage of tests I was given the all clear for breast cancer. So feeling full of the joys I decided to go and see my Mum and put her mind at rest. I know she had been really worried and though we spoke every night on the phone I decided to make an overnight stay. She lives 70 miles from me and in order ...
...to catch the 8am bus. The bus was busy with lots of tourists and hill walkers and I remember thinking poor souls imagine being on holiday on a day like this. It was the 19th of June 1999 and the rain was pouring down so hard the views of Loch Lomond and the Rest and Be Thankful were lost totally shrouded in mist. Despite the weather we pulled into Inveraray on time. I headed up the main street and after I quick word with my cousin who worked in ...

elspeth334 04.12.2006 · Read full review
Ciao members have rated this review on average: very helpful
Review of Member Advice on Coping with Death

I have been reading alot of your reviews on this while thinking long and hard about writing my own, i still dont know how i am going to write about it as it is something i dont think about or talk about in the way i have to, to write this review. I have been here awhile now and got to know some of you better, so i would like to share it with you! As i said in my review about friendship when i was We_Minx, i always had a large group of friends, fellas ...
...of them done the stupidest thing you could think of and ruined it for everyone. Not exactually ruined it but made it very hard for everyone to be with each other at the same time, the way things always used to be. With out going into to much detail, they done something, were put in jail, got out on bail and werent allowed near each other. they werent allowed to talk to each other, friends werent allowed to tell the other one what the other one was ...

Minxx 06.12.2004 · Read full review
Ciao members have rated this review on average: very helpful
Review of Member Advice on Coping with Death

I’ve been feeling quite happy lately and have been attempting different styles for my reviews, some new stories and some (hopefully) more humorous reviews. So why am I returning to what my friends will think is another of my “deep” reviews? There are a few reasons, I wanted to write another poem for a friend, but while I was writing it, I realised that it could apply to a lot of people who have either faced the death of a loved one recently or are ...
...own mother in May 2003 and it has taken me a long time to come to terms with it. I was her carer for many years and since my father had died in 1996, I felt like an orphan, even though I am now 52. Both my parents had strokes and both lived for quite a while after, trapped in useless bodies with no dignity left to them. It may sound callous, but I prayed every night for them to pass away quietly in their sleep. My father lingered on for fourteen ...

Elffriend 08.09.2004 · Read full review
Ciao members have rated this review on average: very helpful
Review of Member Advice on Coping with Death

...came forth from each family member as I called them with the tragic news cannot be repeated for it still hurts eleven years later. Plane tickets had to be obtained for everybody on short notice for he had no other family living close except for us. Soon, they all arrived and so did the day of the funeral. I had the privilege of speaking at John's funeral. It was not easy as we faced friends and family and tried to speak of all that John meant to ...
...to John. During the coming months, we all learned more on how to cope with the death of a loved one, but there were some difficult lessons that had to be learned. I hope some of these may help others as well. 1. Many well-meaing people will say things in a vain attempt to comfort you without realizing they are often only making things more difficult. A person who has not experienced a close loss cannot possibly understand. Even if they have, it ...

UKRushbrook 30.11.2006 · Read full review
Ciao members have rated this review on average: very helpful
Review of Member Advice on Coping with Death

This has an updated conclusion and bit after the 2nd uncle about school for those who are interested ------------------------------------------------------ Most people have been to a funeral. It's something that we accept as part of our life. We know we will have to go to a grandmothers, mothers, fathers, perhaps even brothers or sisters funeral at some point. I'm 17, I'm an only child. In 3 years I went to 3 funerals. 2 of them were suicides, ...
...to me "you've had it pretty rough over the last few years" refering to this, my cheating girlfriend and other things, but I felt somewhat offended by this comment. I always had a positive outlook on life and felt it was wrong for a friend to tell me how I should be feeling. Yes I've lost 2 uncles and a gran, but the rest of the family have been bought closer than before. The story from the start to finish: We booked a holliday to the Lake district ...

C_W_Monkey 16.02.2004 (17.02.2004) · Read full review
Ciao members have rated this review on average: very helpful
Review of Member Advice on Coping with Death

I have thought long and hard as to whether I should write this. Recently I have read a couple of reviews of people who have suffered a loss in their family, or having pregnancy problems and I thought maybe if I could write about my experiences maybe they and anyone else who has who has suffered a loss would take some ray of hope from it. It is not easy to recall even now nine years after but here goes. It was in the autumn of 1994 that we happily ...
...was going well until we went for our scan when things started to not look quite so bright. Some abnormalities showed up on the scan and we were sent to a hospital in London for more tests that could not be done in our local hospital. It emerged that our new daughter, for girl she was to be had some chromosomal abnormalities that we later found out were the result of a genetic disorder. Of course we were absolutely shell-shocked and overwhelmed by ...

docpov 02.06.2004 · Read full review
Ciao members have rated this review on average: very helpful
Review of Member Advice on Coping with Death

It was time for me to go the the antenatel clinic I was 26 weeks pregnant, I felt healthy enough even though fetal movement was not as strong as my other three pregnancies. Although as I was working full time, I had put the lack off fetal movement down to the fact that I was tired when I got home and was sleeping right through the night. When I saw Sarah my midwife at the clinic I did let her know about the lack off fetal movement, but she ...
...baby moveing about alot. As I had never had any problems with any off my other pregnancies, I put it down to the fact that I was over tired. But I had a small doubt in my mind as at my first scan, I was told that there was a small enlargement of my babys kidney's. The hospital had made an arrangement for me to go in for a second scan, when I would be 28 weeks in gestation. I kept putting the doubt to the back off my mind as I had been told that ...

jintybee 20.09.2005 · Read full review
Ciao members have rated this review on average: very helpful
Review of Member Advice on Coping with Death

When i ws 15 years old my mum was diagnosed with breast cancer,I remember the day she sat me down and told me she had to go into hospital for an operation. This operation was for a masectomy,when she had the date through for the op it was the 17th march 1996 I remember this so well because it was a double whammy for me and my mum as that date is my birthday and that year it was also mothers day. So on my 16th birthday I spent the day being looked ...
...went down to her house while my dad took mum to the hospital were she had to stay for a couple of days,I remember thinking how she must be feeling being in hospital on her eldist daughters 16th birthday and mothers day.I know i felt like crap. We went to see her in hospital the day after the op and I remember the bloodstained nighty and her looking really pale,but it was over she'd had the op and i thought that would be it cancer gone. She was ...

sha-olga 24.02.2007 · Read full review
Ciao members have rated this review on average: very helpful
Review of Member Advice on Coping with Death

I don't really know why I am writing this, I have wanted to write part of it for a long time. I have written some feelings about it but nobody has ever read them - not even my husband. I must warn anybody that is going to read this I don't know what I am going to write, so if I ramble or upset anyone then I am sorry. The category is 'Member Advice on Coping with Death' but can anybody really give advice on this - I don't think so because everybody ...
...can only tell how they dealt with it or didn't. I first came across death when I was 8 years old, my Nana had her bed downstairs and my Grandad cooked her meals, I can't remember how long her bed had been downstairs but one day I remember going to visit with my mum after school as we did everyday. My mum had tears in her eyes and one must have rolled down her cheek as I remember saying why are you crying but she said she wasn't. Being so young I ...

rojm 07.09.2009 (13.09.2009) · Read full review
Ciao members have rated this review on average: very helpful
Review of Member Advice on Coping with Death

I had to consider at great length whether or not to write and publish this review. There is considerable controversy surrounding the subject of mediums, clairvoyance, psychic work and the like. Anyway, Ciao seems as good a platform as any, so here goes. My Aunt is now 75 years old. I will call her Tizzy although that is not her birth name. She has never married but I can truly say she is one of the wisest, kindest and most considerate people you ...
...and I wish to share some of it with you. Tizzy has a 'gift'...the uncanny and unexplainable ability to see events that will happen in the future, to view and sometimes explain what has happened in the past and in some cases to apparently communicate (if that is the right word) with people who have died. When she was about 5 years old she was regularly taken by her mother to a friends house to be looked after while her mother went to work as a housemaid. ...

canonmiser 20.05.2005 (08.10.2006) · Read full review
Ciao members have rated this review on average: very helpful
Review of Member Advice on Coping with Death

On 29th June 2004 I went over to my daughter’s crib she was laying on her side. I stroked her back and she felt stiff. I new she was dead I picked her up and turned her towards me her eyes were closed and her mouth open with the bedding imprint on the side of her face. I was crying and said to my partner she dead he screamed no oh nooooooooo! I asked him should I ring the emergency services he nodded so I dialled 999. I was crying so much that the ...
...so my husband took the phone. I ran out of my bedroom, downstairs and out the front door I started being violently sick. My daughter was born on the 6th May 2004she was 6 weeks premature. Nicole was in special baby care for 2 and half weeks. If you have read my review on stillbirth you will already know that I had a still birth last year and a miscarriage before that. So Nicole was our miracle child when she was born. The ambulance was there in ...

dcojago 05.07.2004 · Read full review
Ciao members have rated this review on average: very helpful
Review of Member Advice on Coping with Death

I want to start off my review with a poem: Death is nothing at all I have only slipped away into the next room I am I and you are you whatever we were to each other that we still are call me by my old familiar name speak to me in the easy way which you always used put no difference in your tone wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes we enjoyed together pray smile, think of me, pray for ...
...it always was Let it be spoken without effort without the trace of a shadow in it Life means all that it ever meant it is the same as it ever was there is unbroken continuity why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight? I am waiting for you somewhere very near just around the corner All is well Henry Scott Holland (1847-1918) Canon of St Paul's Cathedral It's a poem that has been read at various funerals and sums up how I have ...

Katieshaz 18.02.2004 · Read full review
Ciao members have rated this review on average: very helpful
Review of Member Advice on Coping with Death