Rude Food Candy Posing Pouch

My other half kindly presented me with a Posing Pouch made of hard sweets for Valentine’s Day last year. The intention was well meant, I am sure, but I just didn’t find the whole thing a turn on and it was uncomfortable to wear.

She paid about five pounds for this and I suppose it was her idea at a ‘romantic’ gift. Unfortunately for me, this posing pouch does not come in different sizes and I had great difficulty in keeping my bits tucked inside but she seemed to find this quite hilarious. Obviously this is a novelty gift and the posing pouch is not intended for everyday use and I believe she bought it to liven things up the bedroom.

Again unfortunately she did not realise when she bought this edible item that it actually contains wheat. My other half is intolerant to wheat and so therefore she was unable to nibble at my pouch as she had intended. The posing pouch remains in its box in the underwear drawer (her’s).

For anyone who may be interested in the full list of ingredients, they are as follows:
Dextrose Maltodextrin (wheat), Citric Acid, Flavouring, Colours: Brilliant Blue (E102), Tartrazine (E102), Allura Red (E129).

I wore the pouch on one occasion only just so she could see what it looks like but as I say I am a large bloke and the elastic was extremely tight and I looked quite ridiculous in it. I think it might work better if the person adorning this novelty product had a trim ‘down there’ beforehand as tufts of ginger mane popping out all over the place doesn’t look attractive in my book.

Overall it’s an okay product and is amusing for about five minutes but not something I would particularly recommend.