Advantages It's used up another quality chunk of my life!
Disadvantages Chinese Whispers and Bad Translations
After completing this and thinking that I was lucky that the world hadn't come to an abrupt halt I furtively searched backdated issues of this review in a bid to understand its source and the reason why the questions were so badly worded…upon finding the answer in a previous review by Garleon I decided to leave my initial answers well alone…after all, why tinker with something that's a little bent up but not broken…so don't penalise on the spelling!The original challenge was set by "nadou" and to quote her initial review…
3 - Girl or boy?Last time I checked I couldn't be sure but after gaining a third, fourth and fifth opinion from passers by on the street I was summarily locked away against my will and labelled as the archetypal representation of a narcissistic personality disordered individual….after researching my new found status I then adopted a number of the pre-ordained characteristics associated with borderline personality disorders and was instantly released back into society and offered the position of Foreign Secretary within the Labour Government…but returning to the question… about 40 minutes at gas mark 7 should do it…
Born in an Anglo-Saxon town known in the 9th Century (according to Dane-law) as Tilchestune…a place that is now recognised for spawning Robert Lindsay (Wolfie Smith of the Tooting Popular Front), for providing a mass of minimum wage employees for the tat excuse for a theme park called 'The American Adventure,' for a god - awful dialect which has been published a number of times under the title "ey up mi duck" and for its faith in the British Nationalist Party…and where do I live now…anywhere as long as it's not the town once called Tilchestune.
4 - Towns? (Birthplace and living town)
Huge! Unfortunately, in all the wrong places and quickly going down hill fast but quitting the evil weed does that to a man, but no worries all is in hand (metaphorically speaking). I vow to start the exercise regime with all the money I have saved from quitting as soon as I can free up the money currently being spent on patches, gum, lozenges, inhalers and tabs.
5 - Size?
6 - Age?As they say…you are as old as the woman that you feel……. Nah too easy…. In Dog years, I am just over 5 with my next Birthday in just under 6 human years time with one big party promising to be a blinder with all the Pedigree Chum and Bonio's you can chomp down on.
7 - Colour of hair?Initially dark blonde, then light brown, then brown, then red, then blue, then black, then white, then back to black again after someone commented that I looked like that bloke out of Chumbawumba who shouts "I get knocked down but I get up again"…then babies…then Brown with a slight flash of silver grey (the silver bit only applies though when I am deliriously hammered and cannot cope with the fact that my hair is slowly but surely slipping into the colour domain of 'pepper'.
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