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I read a couple of these early yesterday evening, so I figured I should give it a go. It has been a while since I wrote anything, so it should be a nice little warm up. Note that these questions, as with EVERY other review in this category, are in terrible English since they were translated over from France. Occasionally, however, they were translated a little too literally. Anyways, enough of the half assed attempt at an intro, here we go!
1 - First Names: Anthony "Fat Tony" Ashfield
2. - Pseudo(s)? Y'what? Isn't that the film with the submarines?
3 - girl or boy? With regards to what? If it's "which are you" then I am a boy, last time I checked.
4 - Towns? (Birthplace and living town) I live in Milton Keynes, Bletchley to be more precise - Bletchley being the breeding ground for chavs of all ages.
5 - Size? That's a bit of a personal question, isn't it? I hope this means how tall am I... I wouldn't want to upset any of the lads here! I am 6'4, and growing rapidly still.
6 - Age? 19, only just turned 19 though
7 - Colour of hair? My hair is very dark brown, almost black, although when it's really sunny it can go almost ginger.
8 - Colour of the eyes? Very dark brown. My eyes are one of (or teo of, I guess) the things I like most about me, since a suprising amount of people, or "fans", if you will, comment on them.
9 - Employment / current occupation? I am doing temp work for an agency called Office Angels. I am working at a human resource company known as Accenture, which is where I am typing this right now. I am also contacting magazines with hopes of becoming a freelancer, or even a staff writer.
10- Astrological and Chinese sign: I am Libra, which is the scales to the lesser astrologically gifted out there, and in Chinese years I was born in the year of the Rabbit. Which, for the less biologically gifted, are the creatures with big ears. And carrots.
11 - I like/love? Yeah I like love, who doesn't like love? Nobody, that's who. I also like my computer games, my lappy-top, and my extensive collection of Futurama DVD's.
12 - I don't like? I HATE racism, I hate bullies, I REALLY hate chavs and yobs, and I hate the build up of limescale you get in the bottom of mugs. Grr! I'm angry now!
13 - If you can meet one person of your choice, dead or alive, known or not, who would this be? Well, since I am still boiling over the last question, someone I can hit! But, if I were calm, I would like to meet someone like Martin Luther King, for some inspirational conversation. Admittedly, he isn't as much of a looker as, say, Christina Ricci (who i would also like to meet. Oh yes. Yes indeed) he is easily one of the most incredible men to ever live. For someone who is alive (Christina Ricci, ooh yeah) it would have to be Bill Bailey. Leslie Neilson comes very close, but there is something about Bill that has me in absolute fits just from seeing his face.
14 - What do you like to do, generally, during the weekend??? I like to spend time with my lovely and beautiful fiance, of course. When I get a break from that (jokes) I am pretty much always either on the PS2 or on my lappy-top, playing MapleStory, an MMORPG (which, if you are interested, is available for free at www.mapleglobal.com)
15 - The town/country that you want to visit or even live in? Venice. It's just the most gorgeous looking place ever! I also want to go to Australia at some point. Or anywhere where the sea is completely translucent!
16 - The first thing you do when you come back from school or work Generally knock back a mug of coffee, burp, get changed, and flick on the lappy-top. Since I stay sat down, it also does my lanky physique good to have a damned hard stretching session.
17 - Style of music or radio that you prefer? Rap. I practically live off of rap, both the angry gangster kind and the uplifting cheerful kind. I also listen to a lot of rock, but then on the flipside I have lot of quiet, "chill out" music. Everytime by Britney Spears, for example, is a fantastic song in my opinion.
18 - The most beautiful song which exists for you? It would have to be Heartbeats by Jose Gonzalez (Spelling, where are you??). It's the song from the advert for the LCD TV where all the bouncy balls are going down the hill. The advert is so peaceful and happy it makes me tearful, and the song is just amazing to listen to when you've had a tough day or feel uptight.
19 - The singer, or band that you prefer? Eminem, D12, and Proof. Proof is my favorite musician EVER, and I sorely miss him and resent the fact that he will never again bless my ears with the sound of his music.
20 - The reality TV show that you prefer? It would have to be Big Brother now, since it's the only one I really know. However, for the two years it was shown for, Survivor was the best. Not that crappy Tribes thing on Channel 4, the really good one where they had to hunt their own food and stuff. It was brilliant, compulsive viewing, and I really wish they'd make another series.
21 - The advertising that you prefer? Funny adverts. Simple as. Ones that have me in fits of laughter are good. I hate most adverts for MacDonalds, Burger King, KFC, or cars. All so tacky and cheap. However, the new Mint Card adverts are a whole new league of their own with the clever/dumb balance. And the Barclays advert with the low doors and signs!
22 - Are you single? No.
23 - If no, are you happy? I surely am. Incidentally, this is a lot longer than I thought it would be...
24 - if yes, are you happy? Ah ha! I see what you're doing here! If I don't answer this, I haven't really answered 100 questions! So yes, I am happy, even though I'm not single! Heh, Fat Tony beats the system again!!
25 - Have you ever known an unhappy love affair? Known, yeah, just stick on daytime television! Been in one? Nope, my fiance is my first and only girlfriend, and we're going strong.
26 - How many Harlequins' collection (books) do you have? How many what? I thought harlequins were a type of model?
27 - Have you ever read "NOUS DEUX" (to make the bond with England, "Nous deux" is a tabloid)? Nous Deux? Bless you...
28 - The magazine that you never miss? Redline. It's a very good car modding magazine. Since I am dead into my cars, it is always on my shopping list when I get paid. It always has really good free gifts, and in depth descriptions of great cars and new parts.
29 - Your book of bedside? My favorite book of bedsides has to be Bedsides of Choice, by Slee Peahead. Heh, seriously now, anything by Terry Pratchett, although to be honest I usually stick a DVD on to sleep to. Didn't I tell you the questions were badly worded?
30 - The novel of which you would have liked to be the author? Lord of the Rings. That bastard must be rolling in it!
31 - Your society game (or console) favourite? My favorite console game, does this mean? At the moment, Kingdom Hearts 2, although I haven't had much time for games what with work and all. In history, it would be Sonic 3 and Sonic and Knuckles. They were innovative with the twin cartridges, and it was a hard game to beat. Plus Sonic is just the best thing ever!
32 - The dish which you prefer? Cauliflower cheese. I also like stir fries, and can cook up a mean roast.
33 - What do you buy when you go to the faire when you are hungry? I don't go to fairs often, and if I do I never buy food there. Call me crazy but I think paying £2.50 for a sausage in a bun that the Bearded Lady probably used as a shaving brush is a waste of cash.
34 - Drink preferred? Tesco Kick. Caffiene rules, especially for parties! Mixed with vodka, and you have something that, WHILST getting you pissed, will cure your hangover at the same time!
35 - Colour preferred? Red and blue. I like big vibrant colours.
36 - fetish number? I didn't realise they were numbered now? I've always had a thing for the number 13. Oooh yes indeed, oh yeah.
37 - The quotation which you prefer? Pretty much anything from Futurama. "If anyone wants me, I'll be in the angry dome!"
"Woop woop woop woop woop!"
"Oh... I made myself sad..."
"I bet I've killed more patients than he's had!"
38 - Film counterpart which you prefer? Counterpart films are illegal aren't they? Sorry, sense of humour hasn't kicked in yet. If it's movie character, then easily James Bond. The cars, the gadgets, the girls.....
39 - Cult movies? I don't like movies where people dress up as witches and burn each other for fun.
40 - Preferred series? Futurama.... 'Nuff said.
41 - Your more beautiful quality? My big brown eyes. I am also very protective over my long brown hair. Also, I am a nice person to talk to, and do my best to help my friends if they ever need it.
42 - Your worst defect? Erm... my freaky skinniness. I have had people jump in shock when they hug me, because I wear loose clothes to hide my unnaturally thin figure.
43 - Your worst nightmare? This really random one where I was in a log cabin surrounded by a wierd nothingness. Scared the daylights out of me. My worst fear, which is another interpretation of "nightmare" in this context, is being buried alive. Uuuurgh, it makes me shudder just thinking about it.
44- The worst shame of your life? Hmm, I don't quite know if this means something bad I have done, or a time I felt ashamed. I felt really guilty once when my fiance (who at the time was a good friend, a lot better than I perhaps took her for back then, but I digress) was off school one day when I was ill. Jokingly, since we goofed about a lot - looking back, I should have asked her out sooner - I said
"How comes you're off school, you sciving again?" (she has never scived before)
To which she replied
"No, my grandad just died"
To say I wanted the ground to swallow me up would be a serious understatement! I hurridly typed out an apology informing her of my rare disease, "Foot-In-Mouth". Needless to say, she was ok with it!
45 - The most beautiful thing which one made for you by love? Huh? Is this a sexual innuendo? if so, I don't get it. If it means literally made as in "crafted" then it would have to be a tiny little worry doll that was made for me. I still have it, it came in its own little sack, and I still talk to it if I feel bad.
46 - The thing of which you are proudest? Hmmm, this is a tricky one. I am proud of my reviews - particulary my SH2 review - but probably not proudEST. I am very proud of my painstakingly-designed background on my profile at www.myspace.com/reddragonflame, but probably not proudest. I suppose in a way I'm proud of everything I do. I'm proud of how I am to people. In a different way, I take pride in how tall I am, but mostly in a show off way.
47 - A fairy lends his magic wand to you for a wish: what you make? Again, is this a sexual innuendo? If not, I would wish that I, and everybody I care about, live long, healthy, wealthy, and happy lives.
48 - The first thing you do in the morning? I don't think I can share that here! Heh heh, I thought I was due a turn with the innuendos! I generally hit Snooze, to be honest. Then get up, get dressed, and begin a hard days work.
49 - What you think when you are not able to fall asleep the evening? The same thing I think every night of my life when I can't sleep: "I sure wish I didn't have insomnia"
50 - What will you bring with you on a desert island?? (5 max)? Erm... can I sack the five and bring a civilization? If not, I guess.... a boat, a large hamper of food, a large hamper of drink, two oars and an in depth atlas OR global positioning device.
51 - If you have to buy a handbook of survive, that would be which? I can only imagine there is a single book in the world called "Handbook of Survive". I like to think it is owned by a cave dweller, or hermit if you will, and is kept in a large hole in the ground, covered in leaves and soot from a nearby fire. And our hermit guards it. He guards it with his life.
52 - Your bedroom take fire (or is flooded, it depends of the place), what do you rescue at first? I would instantly snatch up my lappy-top - believe it or not it is ALWAYS on the floor next to my bed. I would then turn my alarm clock on full to wake the house up to help me battle the fire. If my house is flooded, then I would imagine I would have had enough warning to put everything on higher ground. Still, weathermen these days...
53 - Quelle(s) peluche(s) partagent ton lit? I agree completely..?
54 - What do you have on the wall of your bedroom??? Photos of me and my fiance, and a framed snake.
55 - Pets? Eesh, where to begin.... four cats, a dog, and a psycho rabbit. Did have fish but they died. Fortunately, my family cares for the pets. All I need to care for are my cacti.
56 - You with your parents hear to you well? I have a naturally loud voice, so my family hears me ok. My dad lives miles away though, so he might not hear me so well.
57 - with your brother and sister? They hear me often too. Sometimes they don't. In such situations, usually I have to turn the TV on myself.
58 - Which is the cartoon which you preferred child? Erm.... Captain Bucky O'Hare
59 - And now? Futurama....
60 - Which is the job which you dreamed to have child? I always wanted to be an astronaut. Strange really, when you reach secondary school where you can actually work your balls off and get snapped up by NASA you stop working at it. Shame...
61 - Why the lady is big of her belly? What? I don't think commenting on innocent ladies eating habits - or embarressing glandular problems - is relative to this quiz about me! I'm in the spotlight, give me attention!
Or, maybe she just ate all the pies. Hey fatty! Look! A chocolate bar! Where do you buy your clothes from, Ikea Furnishing Department? You're so fat you have a small colony of mice living in your rolls!
62 - Tell us your more beautiful memory of childhood The first ever time I played a computer game. It was Sonic 1 on the Mega Drive. I got so good - all by myself, noone else played and this was before I was capable of reading, or even aware of game guides - that at the local family pub teenagers would pay for me to play the Mega Drives there so they could see all the secrets I knew.
63 - Were you already scandalmonger (to say evil of people behind their back)? Scandalmonger? Isn't that a porn shop?
64 - You have the possibility of saying your four truths to the person whom I think this is meant to be followed by "You hate the most. What would you say?". I wouldn't say anything. People who I hate I avoid at all costs.
65 - The insult which you say more? I have a habit of murmuring "Bumberclut" to myself
66 - The word or expression which too often returns in your language? See above. I dunno why, it's just a nice word to say when you are in stress.
67- Do you speak another language that English? I can barely speak English half the time! I suck at languages.
68 - Have you already gone in a foreign country? Yep. Germany, Norway, France, Sweden... and Wales.
69 - The area (or the place) of England which you do prefer? Erm... the coast?
70 - You have the possibility of making the farm celebrity, do it you? So yes which activity would prefer you to make? Does this mean going on the TV show "The Farm"? If so, any activity EXCEPT for the piggy pleasing. That was foul.
71 - If one day you become hyper famous, in which field you famous you? In what field would I famous I? Ha ha ha, gotta love this wording! It would probably be writing, or if I get better at it, beatboxing. I can do pretty well, but not half as well as some people can.
72 - What you would make if you gained with the lotto? A nice secure house for me and my future family, an MX5 and mod the brains out of it, and probably a Farrari of some kind.
73 - Where and How do you see you in 2010? In 2040? In 2010? I dunno. In 2040? Old and dunno.
74 - One makes it possible to you to use a "Stargate" (cf Stargate SG1), which planet visits you of first? I thought the Stargates go to random planets? If not, I would visit one made entirely out of cheesecake.
75 - The Earth is destroyed. You have time to flee, where you go? To.... wherever the rocket I flee on is going. Unless my fiance and family couldn't come, in which case I would stay.
76 - The Earth will be destroyed. You do not have time to flee. Which is the last thing which you make? I would make something to defend the planet of course! I would probably marry my fiance there and then. Then get very very drunk.
77 - How many children do you want? Two or three I think. That's the fashinable number isn't it?
78 - How you call them? I would call the girl Emily Rose-Mary, and the lad Oliver Joe. We've decided the names, y'see.
79 - With which resemble you? I personally think I resemble Tom Cruise on a good day, although not many agree. I've been told I look like Russell Brand, Ian Brown, Maggot out of Goldie Lookin' Chain, and the Wolfman.
80 - If you can change a part of your body, which one do you choose? I would try not to have quite as hairy legs as I do. It is really quite scary.
81 - You dye yourself the hair. Which colour you choose? I wouldn't dye my hair. If I was forced to, I would bleach it I guess cos nothing else would show in it. Maybe I'd go pink for the fun of it.
82 - If you can have a tattoo, what?? And Where?? I want to have a large red dragon, tail starting on my left chest area, wrapping down around my right arm, stopping half way between my wrist and elbow. I need to get some more muscle on my arms first though. Plus I'm afraid of needles!
83 - Are you beginning, intermediary or expert when it acts of Internet? I'm an expert, I can play games, chat, and search for porn simultaniously.
84 - What there is on your carpet of mouse? I have a lappy-top, so it's a finger pad. Stoo-pid.
85 - Which is your bottom of screen on your ordi? On my what? If this is computer related, I guess this means the screen, and by bottom it either means the task bar or the desktop... well, there is nothing on the task bar at home at the moment because I'm not there, but here at work there's two work programs that I can't go into, Outlook, Ciao, and a notepad that I always keep open. For the desktop wallpaper, it's an Accenture office. At home my wallpaper is the previously mentioned Fat Tony background.
86 - What can we find under your bed (with share the breeding of sheep)? With the breeding of sheep?? Enough of the stereotypical Welsh pornographic references! Under my bed is little more than rubbish, clothes, and old bottles of Kick. Dirty little begger, the man who wrote this!
87 - How many times a week do you come on Internet? How many hours? Every day for longer than it probably healthy! I suppose since I'm online at work I'm online for at least 9 hours a day...
88 - What do you think about the breedings virtual on Internet? Is that cybersex or porn? Porn's great! But cybersex...I've never seen the fascination. Especially when people ask me if I wanna take part and ask what I'm doing. I'm like... I'm sat topless on my bed, watching Futurama, eating a big bag of cheesy Doritos, and playing MapleStory. Soon, I am going to to toilet. I might even get a drink. Oooooh, sexy!
89 - What was your resolution on the New Year? I didn't make one. I never do, I hate having that extra feeling of crippling failure on my back.
90 - Do you do it? No. I think I cleared that one up just now!
91 - The best gift that somebody offer to you? I was most excited when I was given a GameBoy Camera for Christmas one year. That was a great day!
92 - The worst gift that somebody offer to you? I think the worst thing I was ever given was an electric razor. I know that sounds harsh, but it had been really really hyped up leading up to the opening and then..... it was a razor. I didn't even properly shave back then! I used it once, then it broke cos it was a cheap razor. It really was the most pointless and, considering my beard was non existant at that age, thoughtless gift ever. Not to say thought wasn't put into it, snice they were excited at giving it to me, just I think momentarily common sense, logic, and biological consistancies went out of mind for five minutes as they bought it.
Don't think I wasn't grateful though. I was very pleased with it and it took me over a year AFTER it broke to summon up the guts to throw it out.
93 - Somebody offer to you a house. You choose an igloo, an Indian tipi, an African box, the same house as your parents, a farm?
Erm... the only normal one here, the same house as my mum.
94 - Kilos to be taken? Of what?
95 - Kilos to loose? Again, of what? If we are talking some illegal substance then it depends on the police force in the area.
96 - The best teacher do you have? I don't have any teachers at the moment. Life in itself is a lesson, in it's own little ways. I am always learning, always trying to better myself.
97 - The worst teacher do you have? I had a maths teacher whom I loathed, and who similarly loathed me. Heh heh heh, I hated that bastard. He even had the nerve, shortly before I worked for Nationwide Building Society, to mock me for working at MacDonalds. Since, in the six months between the last time he saw me and then I had gotten over depression, worked 8-9 hour shifts five or six days a week, had busted a nut earning the job at Nationwide, and had suffered family problems worse than you could imagine, to say I went ballistic would be an understatement. Stupid stuck up prick. In fact, I hated most of the teachers at my school now that I look back. I went to a grammar school, and the people there are stuck up toffs who think they're better than everyone. Even you. Yes, you, reader.
98 - Dedication this questionnaire with somebody? Erm.... Anyone who can make me laugh. If someone reads this and decides to do it, I'd like them to let me know so I can read it.
99 - What do you think of this questionnaire? Badly translated, a waste of an hour, but an hour has passed none the less.
100 - You will advise it? If so, which message you would give? Don't do it when your boss is around! Have fun with it, it isn't as long as it perhaps appears to be, and it's full of fun to answer questions!
Well, I hope you enjoyed that. Let me know if you feel inspired to write one yourself, and I will happily go rate it! Have a good day!
-=UPDATE=- DVD extras ========= Someone left a comment raising a very good point. I have rated this as a DVD. So, since I had overlooked that, I trotted off to change it, out of general boredom. But, then I had a brainwave! Which is unusual for me, bu anyway. What if, and I bet you know where I'm going with this, what if I had DVD extras? What would they consist of? Here's what I'd like.
AUDIO COMMENTRY - By myself, naturally, discussing reasons for my actions, and also by Quentin Tarantino. I'd be curious to know where additional blood and gore would have been nice. An additional commentry from God would be interesting. I'd like to know exactly WHY he chose that particular day for me to have an accident on my bike, and why he decided we weren't worthy of the World Cup
BLOOPER REEL - Ah yes, what went wrong, when, and why. Ah hah, that would be a funny one! Look in awe, as he plugs in the backless socket with bare hands! Be amazed, as he attempts to jump on the bear from behind! Scream at the set as he tries to clean the food processor whilst it is still plugged in!
DELETED AND EXTENDED SCENES - See the great vomiting escapade from 2004 without relying on Drunken Vision! Witness as he sets fire to his shoes from 4 different angles! Gasp as you see what they were planning to draw on his face as he slept!
CASTING INTERVIEWS - Well, with me anyway. Packed full of classical one liners, such as "I remember when I were a wee lass."
ALTERNATIVE ENDINGS - Pick the unfortunate demise of our plucky hero! Will he be hit by a truck, decapitated by a flying baguette, crushed under the weight of a thousand packets of Jelly Babies, disembowelled by an ancient civilisation of religious kittens who found their way into his lunchbox one evening, or in a way made up by you, the sadistic and malicious viewer?
Well, I hope that bought a brief smile to your furry little faces, guys and gals.