DAMM FINE BEER

Advantages: Surprisingly good
Disadvantages: Not many

...AK Damm 1876 was produced to celebrate the founding of the Damm brewery in (wait for it) 1876 in Barcelona by a guy called Augustus Kuentzmann. Yes, you guessed right, he wasn't a native of Catalan, but an expat from Alsace. He decided to brew a type of beer he was familiar with, but the locals weren't. And so a legend was born...or at the very least, an uninteresting story. These days, the Damm brewery produce a modest range of different beers, the most famous being Estrella Damm and Voll Damm, but here's what they say about AK Damm: "Pure malt from selected varieties and hops from the German Hallertau region give this beer its smooth personality." Speaking of Alsations... An Alsatian went into a telegram office, took out a blank form and wrote: 'Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof.' The clerk examined...

proxam 21.04.2006 · Read review
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Review of SA Damm AK Damm 1876

Van Damme

Advantages:
Disadvantages:

...In this one, Jean-Claude Van Damme plays a French cop (to explain the accent) who discovers he has a twin brother heavily involved with the Russian mob. This, the second film in what is to become the Van Damme twin trilogy, is the second worst Van Damme film after Cyborg. Not one thing in this movie makes sense at all. After his brother's death, Alain (Van Damme) travels to New York where everyone mistakes him for his brother Mikhail, including his brother's old flame (Natasha Henstridge) and two incredibly dim FBI agents. The convoluted plot wouldn't be a problem if there were some cool action scenes to drive the film and fool the audience into thinking its fun. Sadly, even Hong Kong action maestro Ringo Lam (City On Fire and Jackie Chan's Twin Dragons) couldn't save this movie even if he wanted to. Hopefully, he'll follow his protégé...

Mohammed 24.07.2000 · Read review
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Review of Maximum Risk (DVD)

Van Damme's finest hour

Advantages: Great performance from Van Damme
Disadvantages: Not your typical action flick

...You know, I've always thought that Jean-Claude Van Damme got a raw deal from Hollywood. Talented, charismatic and undeniably athletic, he was a high-kicking sensation when he burst onto the action scene in the late-80's. But poor career choices and well-documented personal problems meant he never quite hit the big time as an action star. These days, people largely think of him as the king of B-movies, lumping him in with fellow low-rent actor Steven Segal. But whereas Segal's career floundered under the weight of his ego, lack of personality and expanding waistline, Van Damme's is a more interesting and, in some ways, more tragic story. JCVD is a work of fiction based around reality. And the reality, in this case, is Van Damme himself. The film opens by introducing Van Damme as a faded, over the hill action star. His agent can...

Dr-Jones 19.10.2009 · Read review
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Review of JCVD (DVD)

Van Damme's finest hour - great film

Advantages: Great acting by Van Damme
Disadvantages: If you go into it expecting a conventional action flick, you'll be disappointed

...You know, I've always felt that Jean-Claude Van Damme got a raw deal from Hollywood. Talented, charismatic and undeniably athletic, he was a high-kicking sensation when he burst onto the action scene in the late-80's. But poor career choices and well-documented personal problems meant he never quite hit the big time as an action star. These days, people largely think of him as the king of B-movies, lumping him in with fellow low-rent actor Steven Segal. But whereas Segal's career floundered under the weight of his ego, lack of personality and expanding waistline, Van Damme's is a more interesting and, in some ways, more tragic story. JCVD is a work of fiction based around reality. And the reality, in this case, is Van Damme himself. The film opens by introducing Van Damme as a faded, over the hill action star. His agent can't get...

Dr-Jones 14.10.2009 · Read review
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Review of JCVD

DAMM THEM BUGS

Advantages: none what so ever
Disadvantages: see op

...I would say that nearly everyone has experienced getting bitten by some sort of insect before, and those that have, know just how damm painful it can be. Well I used to live in London until recently, and had never been bitten before, but since moving to the country I have suffered terribly. Last summer was worse than this year, I don’t know what sort of insects keep biting me and still don’t. I had bites on my arms and legs, which were very red and itchy and caused terrible swellings, my legs, were so painful that I had trouble walking. I went to my local chemist to see if they could recommend anything. I was advised to purchase Piriton allergy tablets, which the pharmacist suggested for quick relief. I got home and decided to take a tablet straight away, four hours later I took another one and then another. In this time...

Deni 26.10.2001 · Read review
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Review of Piritin

Double Van Damme - Double Impact

Advantages: A kick ass movie
Disadvantages: It's not rocket science

...Mr Van Damme is one of fortunes favoured few - a famous Belgian. (OK who thought he was French). He was a renowned body builder and karate expert in his home country before he made a fledgling career in Hong Kong ku fu movies and subsequently moved out to Hollywood in the early 1980's, where he got his big break in the Seattle karate film No Retreat No Surrender. So what about this film then? Made in 1991, it's a martial arts film with Van Damme taking the parts of both twin brothers. Stop laughing at the back there. Twins by the name of Chad and Alex Wagner are forcibly split up after the murder of their parents by a Hong Kong triad. Alex stays in the former British colony ending up as a smuggler/run runner, while Chad somehow (it isn't explained) ends up in Los Angeles as a personal trainer. To make matters even...

pinkmatchstick 23.12.2005 · Read review
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Review of Double Impact (DVD)

Van Damme gets bloody in yet another action thriller.

Advantages: Plenty of punching, kicking and shooting.
Disadvantages: Cliched, stale plotline, stiff dialogue and characters.

...Another of the countless Van Damme films to be unleashed upon the public. Naturally its an action thriller starring Van Damme as a 'kickboxing police inspector', interesting premise so far, trying to solve the murder of his twin brother whom he was seperated from at a very young age. Funny how Van Damme plays his own twin in another film but nonethless a fairly typical Van Damme plot, namely Van Damme taking revenge for something, usually a death with plenty of bloodspill on the way there. Of course there's eyecandy also, where would a Van Damme film be without the love interest? Natasha Henstridge is provided as blonde totty for the muscled star. Strangely she was his brother's girlfriend whilst he was living, not at all creepy that she ends up dating her dead boyfriend's brother? Odder still the fact that Van Damme's character...

Rustycakes 17.08.2009 · Read review
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Review of Maximum Risk (DVD)

Van Damme not at his best

Advantages: Van Damme action
Disadvantages: Lame film

...One of Van Damme's first films and he will be glad that it was. At least he hadn't gotten much of a following at that point. If he had, it would have destroyed his career! The plot is almost non-existent, set in post-apocalyptic future with a disease ravaging the American nation...scientists are close to the cure and Gibson (Van Damme) is en route to help spur them on. The action isn't too bad, but as always in these films you get the whole Van Damme kicking the living hell out of people with ease to come up against a dumb opponent at the end where he nearly loses just to put up a spirited fight back at the end to claim the victory....cliched to the hilt. I wouldn't recommend it unless you are a Van Damme follower who has yet to see this film....

poodu 12.07.2000 · Read review
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Review of Cyborg (DVD)

Don't give a damn about Van Damme

Advantages: Watchable enough action film
Disadvantages: Wooden acting, weak plot

...his wife does not die? I missed the whole Jean-Claude Van Damme sensation, because I was overseas at the time. In fact, the only time I've ever seen him is during the brief role he had as Rachel's love interest in Friends! I have heard a lot of good things about him though; particularly with respect for this film, for which I have rarely read a bad review. So although I am not a huge fan of action films, I decided to give this a go. Walker is played by Van Damme. As expected, Van Damme gave a typical action flick performance, with some pretty good fighting scenes. Shame though that he can't really act. I found him wooden and unbelievable apart from when he was fighting. What made it worse for me was this terrible bouffant haircut that he had when playing his 2004 character. He looked like he had just walked out of the 1980s and I was...

sunmeilan 29.04.2007 · Read review
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Review of Timecop (DVD)

Van Damme and his emotionless acting

Advantages: good plot and good casting
Disadvantages: stars Van Damme (but least he is good in this film)

...For you people who are familiar with his work you will have probably noticed his emotionless acting and quite a few of his films are very similar. Even at the start they seemed the same (Bloodsport, Kickboxer (I think that's the right name) and later, they just plain dumb. I mean, what was Knock Off all about? But Universal Soldier stands out as his best movie.(not like there was a wide selection.) This movie is different from all other Van Damme movies because 1) It's not all about fighting (sci-fi war), 2) it's not 100% Van Damme, 3) he doesn't have a lot of lines and crappy delivery of those few lines are OK. This is not a fighting movie. That's right, it's not a typo. Yes, there's fighting in it, but it isn't the point of the movie. In this movie, he's not primarily a fighter, he's just a guy that can fight. They could have...

zarniwoop 10.10.2001 · Read review
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Review of Universal Soldier