The mean machine!

Advantages: Vinnie Jones, english football
Disadvantages: none, other than perhaps violence/swearing if you dislike it

...→ Introduction I also own the original version, the Longest Yard, and I must say I enjoy this one more - I think because its soccer, rather than american football, and as a British girl I can understand it better. And, of course, it has the hilarious charm of Vinnie Jones, and his foul mouth. → The Original - The Longest Yard The original was made in 1974, and, of course, starred the infamous Burt Reynolds. The principle is the same as what you'll read below, but its American Football - Burt Reynolds character, Paul Crewe, is a former pro-quarterback. Just a bit of history. → Re-Make Info The Longest Yard was re-made into an english version, Mean Machine, in 2001, starring Vinnie Jones as the leading lad. One of the original writers, Tracy Keenan Wynn, joins Charlie Fletcher, Chris Baker and Andrew Day to bring...

rhidassa 28.07.2006 (06.08.2006) · Read review
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Review of Mean Machine (DVD)

Mean Machine

Advantages: actually good
Disadvantages: langauge can offend

...--> Opinion What a film to watch indeed! Even for people who may ran away if football comes on the T.V will find this film enjoyable! I have watched this film over 30 times, yet it still doesn?t become boring at all. -->The plot The plot of the film is very simple, which is probably why its so remarkable. Many films?s today add too much detail, especially in a sequence, leaving the second, third or fourth film never the best as the first because you have to add more detail. Vinnie Jones plays a ex England football captain (Danny Mean) who is thrown into jail for drink driving and assaulting two policeman (If you like action, so good so far). However while in jail people aren?t exactly warming up to Danny Mean because he betrayed his team in a crucial world cup game. However hard Danny Mean tries through, he just can?t keep his head...

richyncfc 10.06.2007 · Read review
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Review of Mean Machine (DVD)

Mean Machine

Advantages: Realistic to prison life
Disadvantages: needs to be funnier

...Mean Machine is a follow up to Lock, Stock and two smoking barrels and also Snatch in which ex footballer Vinnie played small 'hard man' parts. If you've seen both of those films then Mean Machine is a must see. Vinnie plays a ex England football player called Danny Meehan who has everything going for him until he is accused of throwing a match so that Germany would win. After this his career in football is over and he hits the bottle trying to cope with everything. He is then arrested for drunken assault on two police officers and is given 3 years in jail, which is the maximum sentence for that crime. As soon as he arrives at the prison he is treated like scum to those that are in there including the prison officers. The prisoners can't get over the fact that he betrayed his country, even though it was only a football match. They...

sarah3239 18.03.2003 · Read review
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Review of The Mean Machine (DVD)

Lean, Mean, Cardboard Making Machine

Advantages: Less cooking smells in the kitchen
Disadvantages: Food tastes like re-constituted cardboard!

...~ ~ For the past year or more I?ve been reading gushing and overwhelmingly complimentary reviews here at Ciao about the new ?wonder? grill for the kitchen endorsed by none other than the famous ex-boxer George Foreman. I usually left a remark in the comments box saying something along the lines of ?This sounds great. Don?t have one yet, but must get around to buying one soon.? Of course, being a lazy wee mad cabbie, the purchase was very firmly put on the ?long finger?. (Never do today what you can put off until tomorrow) But when I spotted the large version (it comes in various sizes and models) on offer in our local Superquinn supermarket at the special offer price of only ?54.99, it was enough to entice me to reach into my wallet for my little flexible friend. (Credit card) ~ ~ The model I purchased is called the ?Lean, Mean Fat...

the_mad_cabbie 08.04.2004 · Read review
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Review of George Foreman Lean Mean Fat Reducing Grilling Machine

Put that in your trophy cabinet

Advantages: Entertaining throughout
Disadvantages: Nothing special

...make you chuckle. I was impressed with the direction of David Skolnick, and felt that the film just kept going. It didn't drag at all and was entertaining thoughout. However, I can see it easily being a bit boring for those who aren't really up to speed or interested in football, as a lot of the focus towards the end of the film features the sport. Don't let this put you off , though - it's an entertaining film from start to finish, and while it may not actually be particularly special, it's a lot better than some of the tripe I've seen lately. The DVD copy I have doesn't have any extras, but I'm not particularly fussed about that, and nor are most people going to be, I imagine. Mean Machine is currently available from amazon.co.uk for around the £3 mark, though be careful to not confuse it with the US original of the same name....

pmcds 29.04.2009 · Read review
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Review of Mean Machine (DVD)

Mean Machine

Advantages: Vinnie Jones and Jason Statham - Jones can really act and Statham is hilarious in this role
Disadvantages: Hmm if I had to pick anything out it wouldprobably be the swearing - only because we watched it with the kids and would prefer for them not to hear quite so much!

......

kipskabin 23.06.2005 · Read review
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Review of Mean Machine (DVD)

Mean Machine soccer in the slammer

Advantages: Reasonable performances - decent story
Disadvantages: The new Carry On team?

...The latest offering from Vinnie Jones & co., I went to see Mean Machine because I wanted to see if the Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels team could rise above Snatch, or if Vinnie, who was great in Lock Stock can do any more on the screen than he used to do on the soccer pitch. The story is not too taxing to follow, a has been footballer falls from grace for match fixing and loses the respect of his one time fans and hurtles into a self-destructive lifestyle mixing fast cars and booze. Naturally, the law catch up with him, the result of which is that he ends up with a three year sentence for assault on two of her majesty's and drink driving. He ends up in a high security prison, run by a governor with a rather serious gambling habit, the profits of which he uses to fund the prison guards soccer team. The governor specially...

jacksonandy 05.02.2002 · Read review
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Review of The Mean Machine (DVD)

Great Machine!

Advantages: Quick Work-Out, Cheaper than Power Plates, Great Results
Disadvantages: Only tones your body, doesnt keep you fit.

...This machine is simply a must if you want to tone yourself up and not have the hassle of going to the gym for hours each week! I bought one of these off Ebay, and now so glad i did. Its simply an amazing piece of kit. My Personal Experience At first i thought, surely this machine cant be as good as i've been reading all over the net, people must be exagerating and just trying to sell the machine. How wrong i was.... The first time i used this, i trained at level 10 (ranges from 1-20) thinking i can take it at that level no problem, and sure enough i was ok, i did a few different positions for my legs, stomache and arms. I trained for about 10 minutes, as i wanted to see how much this would actualy do, and sales reports tell me that 10minutes of using this machine is equivelent to 1 hour at the gym. Boy oh boy did i feel it...

Mark_K 27.03.2008 (28.03.2008) · Read review
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I'm dreaming of a happy prison

Advantages: Can be funny and good when there's nothing else on
Disadvantages: Most would probably find it to be a joke

...Don't you just love it when a movie on television just reaches out and grabs you, compelling you to watch the remaining two hours. Well maybe Mean Machine didn't exactly grab me as I saw it in the Channel 4 line-up, but with nothing else to really watch you can't argue with a Sunday night movie. Of course my experiences with Ch4 movies haven't been great, I seem to remember the last one I watched was Cabin Fever, one of my most hated movies of all time, so how did Mean Machine fair at filling in that gap in the schedule between 10pm and midnight? I literally knew nothing about Mean Machine, I'm pretty sure it is a film title I have heard of in passing but it wasn't until my dad piped up about not liking this as a remake that I finally clicked that I wasn't watching an original. My bad. Mean Machine is said to be a 2001 remake...

nathaninnit 27.08.2007 · Read review
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Review of Mean Machine (DVD)

Not your usual suspects

Advantages: Great actors, good story, nice sound track.
Disadvantages: none

...Mean Machines ? Not your usual suspects. Mean Machines was released in 2001 and is on TV quite a lot. It was shown a few weeks ago on Film4 so I thought I?d do a quick review as it is also a brilliant film and one of my favourites. Being a big football fan I instantly liked the plot and the fact Vinnie Jones was starred in it. I was a fan of Vinnie as a footballer and thought he played his role well in this. I don?t really like sitting down and watching a lot of films and my partner always wants to so this is the only kind of film you would see me watching. The film consists of a great cast and a good director who has only directed this film which was successful. Although the main theme is about football there are many other sub plots to attract others such as comedy, friendship and morals. Mean Machines is a comedy adapted...

sappleyard 14.05.2009 · Read review
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Review of Mean Machine (DVD)